Facing the emotional damage of infertility.
Hi everyone. I am a 19 year old female. I have been married for almost a year to a very wonderful man. He wants to start a family. So, in November of last year, I went off my birth control and decided we would start trying to conceive. Needless to say, things are not working out as planned. I saw my doctor after six months and we started doing some testing. It's obvious that by this time, I should be pregnant. But, I'm not. My doctor ran blood work, did pap smears, ultrasounds, x-rays, pretty much everything she could think of, and there's still no obvious reason that something is wrong, besides the fact that my menstrual cycle is only 14-21 days long. More often than not, I get my period once every 2 weeks. I'm due to see a fertility specialist on the 25th of this month.
I have been completely devestated by my in-ability to conceive. Both of my sister-in-laws are currently pregnant, and believe me when I say, they don't mind rubbing it in my face. It's like, every where I go there is someone who's pregnant or has a new born with them. It's like God is slapping me in the face every time I leave my house or get on Facebook. Every day, I find out that another person is pregnant. So why not me? Why did this have to happen to me? And why can no one find out why? Some days, I don't even want to get out of bed.
I have done tons of research on ways to increase your chances, right down from sex positions to what diets to put myself on. Nothing seems to be working. My husband is disapointed and it's starting to cause tension between us. I feel like I am letting him down. Maybe if he had've known, he wouldn't have married me.
My mother says that God must not think I could be a good mother, or I would have children. My mother-in-law is now looking down on me for not being able to give her another grand child. I just feel like the whole world is against me.