well its been over a year now...last january was the last time. And when I say sex I mean everything not just intercourse. I didnt wait long to talk to him about it. It was about a couple of weeks of nothing before i confronted him. He told me it was his weight that he felt uncomfortable about. He has been overweight the whole time we have been together (3 years) but I have NEVER made him feel uncomfortable about it. I understand why he would not be happy in himself, and I cook balanced meals only to help him but I have never even thought, let alone said, that I would like him to lose weight for me. The reason why he is overweight is because he never exercises and he likes to drink. Not often, but when he does he drinks dark rum and full sugar cola and a lot of it. Ive tried telling him that if he really wants to lose weight he really should cut out drinking for a while. But of course its a vicious circle. Hes down about his weight so he drinks but he drinks because hes down about his weight. Now like I said I have talked to him about it and I have done every couple of weeks since it started happening and its just stayed the same. I know its not his libido because I have seen porn on our computer recently watched. I also know its not that hes gone off me. Im happy with the way I look and I know he is too. I know that he cant feel that he's not good enough for me because like I said he has been overweight the entire time we've been together and the two out of three years has been fine. I know he's not cheating on me. Two reasons. I know him better than he knows himself sometimes and not only has he not got it in him to do that but I can tell he has no confidence that anyone would find him attractive. Something that I still try to make him feel all the time. This post is to find out what I might do, not to find out why he might be doing it. I really have tried everything I can think of and Im getting so upset about it now. I dont think I need to write how neglected I feel. Im sure you can imagine/understand. Me initiating any sexual act is out of the question now as Ive tried that before, got told he didnt want to and now I really need him to show me he wants to for himself not just to make me feel better. I would just feel like hes doing me a "favour". Keep in mind everything Im saying here Ive said to his face. Sorry for the long post but PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE HELP! :(