I'm 24 years old and my fiance is older than me by one year only. I'm a mature and a grown up girl but he sometimes i get the feeling that he has a weak personality...he is easily persuaded and he can’t make his own decisions unless he asks for others' opinions first.
i do the same i like to hear others' opinions but i don't just go and do what they say i analyze and think about what they said and either i do it or get another idea of what they said...but he doesn't do that...he does what he hears if its a good idea...he doesn't come up with any ideas...just waits for someone to do the thinking for him...and because i am the kind of person that doesn't sit and wait for the answers...i end up doing all the thinking...and i don't like that i fell like i am the one who is controlling things just like i was doing when i was single so why am i in a relationship?!!!
my friends & family tell me that he is a kind man and that's not a bad thing he doesn’t want to be a dictator with you and you can teach him how you want him to be…
i know its not a bad thing that he is kind and loving and would do anything for me…the problem is that he is TOO kind
beside i don’t want a child to raise and teach him how i want him to act..i want a man…a man i can relay on...to feel safe with.
i am not happy...i feel something is missing...maybe because i have this idea about the perfect guy for me and he is not him from the strong personality aspect...he is more of a soft personality
i keep tiring to convince myself that he is the perfect logical choice… he loves me, would do anything for me and would never hurt me…then i go to sleep convinced that i made the right choice but a wake up the next morning telling myself "i am convincing myself…it shouldn’t be like this...i shouldn't be convince myself”
sometimes i love him so dearly and sometimes i feel i can’t stand him…i keep seeing flows in him…and i tell myself “if i truly love him, i am not suppose to see any flows in him…right?!!
one more thing…i am not exactly an angle you know i am a moody person sometimes i become grumpy out of nowhere and he bares me...he is a sweet guy really
we have good communication we can talk to each other easily…it’s that what marriage is all about good communication…when all the glamor goes away and all that is left is how we treat each other?!!
i am so confused and i can’t make up my mind…i love him i know that…but...
will i be able to live with him like and i am the one who is doing all the thinking?!!!
Can i do something to make him more mature?!! do i step back and let him think about everything?!!
will he be able to step in and handle things when he is needed?!!