So the best sex I've ever had in my entire life is the sex I have with my husband every single time. I'm not trying to be high falutin about this; of course we're in love and that makes all the difference in the world. There are quite a few other things that also make this possible.
One is, my husband and I feel safe with each other emotionally. This means, especially for women, that we can really let loose in bed. As is common knowledge these days, women need an emotional connection to let down their guard when it comes to really enjoying and experimenting with sex. The emotional safety means: I know he's not going to reject me (HUGE for women) I know he's not going to criticize my body/odor/technique - also MAJOR areas of fear and ways in which women shut down during sex. Finally, and this is more important than we realize, ladies, I know he's not going to push me away, fall asleep immediately, grow cold toward me after sex - yes, I know, it's cliche, and yes, it's also extremely true - many of us really do need cuddling and affection after sex.
Given this level of safety and intimacy, I can relax and do things I've never done before. I dress up in character outfits. (This turns me on more than it does him if that is possible). Last night we had some soft porn Cancun Playtime thing on our giant television in our bedroom as we were making love. IT WAS HOT! As an extremely visual person, my husband was intoxicated with the triple pleasure of watching the sexiness onscreen, actually having sex himself, and watching me watch the sexiness on tv.
As he made love to me and we both alternated between being lost in the moment of our lovemaking and watching the naked people on television making love, rubbing, licking, moaning, vibrating, it reached a level of intensity where we were, really, all naked together, yet still separated by appropriate and necessary boundaries.
I think so many women are extremely threatened by their man watching other women have sex in the form of magazines, porn, etc, but it can be wonderfully liberating to share this with your man, especially if he's coming home to one woman, you, every day.
For a man, the thought of being able to relax a little bit about the monogamy pressures while still remaining faithful is a gift. This is a two-way street... a man must be able to make his woman feel secure, loved, the number one woman off all time in his life in order for her to loosen up and let him watch a hot young mama onscreen without feeling sick to her stomach.
One thing is for sure, when the love and emotional connection are there, the chemistry is right, the mood is on, turn on some Showtime and go to Cancun with your lover in bed...watch the sparks fly - it's a cheap vacation!