I starting dating my boyfriend a year after his divorce. We have been in a relationship for 4 years and lived together for 3. He is 41 and I am 42. We have so much fun together and he speaks of marriage but he just told me that he is leaving and didnt tell me why. It has been two months since he broke it off and three weeks since I've had a conversation with him. He now tells the reason why he left. Because he wants to be by himself because he has never been by himself before. He says he has always been in and out of relationships. He says he wants to be able to come and go as he please without answering to anyone. He tells me how much he loves me and that I was very good to him but he needs to get this out of his system in order to have a successful relationship with me or anyone for that matter. He says that he doesn't know how long it will take maybe 1 to 2 years but as soon as he get it out of his system he wants to marry me if I'm not in a relationship or married of course. He asked me why do I think he left and I told him because he wants to be with other women. He says no I just want to feel how it is to be by myself. Should I believe him or not?
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Hi Confused,
I'm sorry to hear that. It sounds like it can be two things- either he genuinely wants to be alone and out of a relationship or he's trying to see if the grass is greener on the other side and will come back if it isn't. If hes always been in serious relationships then he has never fooled around with no commitment-- sounds like he may even be having a mid life crisis.
I don't know him and it's really hard to say if his intentions are innocent or if he's playing you for a fool. But you've been with him for 4 years and in your heart you'll know if he is being true to you or if what he wants out of his system is something else. Then you'll decide if you'll take him back or even feel the same way a year or two from now.
Good Luck,
Rosa
June 21, 2011 - 6:35amThis Comment