Disappearing orgasms?

By Anonymous October 22, 2017 - 3:23pm

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So,
I've been wondering now for a while whether my experience is normal, and if there is anything I can do about it.

Until now, I firmly believed I had never had an orgasm, alone or with a partner.
Alone I thought I struggle to arouse myself enough, and with a partner I thought perhaps it was because I was never with anyone long-term enough to relax enough.

BUT
I have been having the same issue with my boyfriend as well, and it has now started to bother me

I definitely get aroused enough when I'm with him, no question about that, and the sex is great either way..

But I don't know if I'm having just tiny pretty much unnoticeable orgasms, or none at all?

I get to a stage that in my mind is the "just before" climax, my legs shake/twitch and I get a warm light-headed sensation, shortness of breath. And then it just suddenly disappears out of the blue, my clit becomes sensitive almost to the point of being painful to the touch, my breathing slows down rapidly and i feel "done"

But there's no point of release, or anything that to me feels even remotely like what i would describe as a climax?

Any ideas on what's going on?

I get the feeling that it's making my boyfriend a bit insecure, as all he wants it for me to enjoy it as much as him (and I do, but he doesn't believe me), which is in turn making me feel insecure. But I don't want to lie to him and say I've orgasmed either, especially when I'm not even sure what's happening

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Anonymous

Hi, I’m wondering if you figured things out? From what you’ve described, I am going through the literal exact same situation, to the tee! Hoping there was some resolution.

March 18, 2019 - 11:32pm

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Helena Guide

Hello. Thank you for posting.

As long as you are happy with your boyfriend and are enjoying sex, I would focus on that. That said, it can be easier said than done. It sounds as though you are having an orgasm from what you describe. Hopefully, some members can share their experiences with you. Below is a link that might help in the meantime.

https://www.webmd.com/sexual-conditions/features/cant-orgasm-heres-help-for-women#1

Helena

October 22, 2017 - 3:38pm