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I have a worry with my sister

By Anonymous July 23, 2018 - 9:29pm
 
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My sister as MS, and currently does 7 days exercise, each day doing 5 hours on a treadmill, I think it's way too much but every time we try and speak to her she feels like we're picking on her...

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Anonymous

Well the lunch didn't really work, she's digging her heels in... She has agreed to have 1 days rest as of next week, I tried to get her to have 1 day off this week as a first step, which at first she agreed to... then changed her mind and said next week again...

I also mentioned the amount of time needs to come down, but I just don't think she will... she's under 9 and a half stone now, her arms are wafer thin and she really looks so drawn, I do think it's going to take professional help... She just doesn't think anything she's doing is wrong... :(

July 31, 2018 - 5:39pm
HERWriter Guide (reply to Anonymous)

Try your best. She may open up to therapy in time because her health issues are not sustainable as they currently exist. Be her sister, her listener, her adviser. You're doing a great job so far. These things take time.
Best,
Susan

August 1, 2018 - 11:06am
HERWriter Guide

Hello Anon

Thank you for writing!

Five hours per day on a treadmill is excessive, even for an athlete. There may be some of emotional component going on - perhaps she is in denial about her condition or she may think that over-exercise will somehow help her overcome the MS or be able to handle it better.

You can't stop her from using the treadmill but you can encourage her to do something else, without mentioning her MS or how tired she may be. Go on a walk together, perhaps, or suggest a swim. Doing these activities may also give her a chance to talk out her feelings.
Additionally, therapy may help.
Best,
Susan

July 24, 2018 - 4:44am
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Susan Cody)

Yeah I have thought it was relating to her MS and thinking by doing this excessive exercise it would somehow stop it, or stop it from worsening...

Or that it was some sort of eating disorder, she's gone from 15 stone to down to 7 stone... and doesn't seem to be stopping...

Mum doesn't want to address it with a doctor as she's worried my sister will lose her benefits, which they do rely on... so I just don't know what to do, I feel she needs therapy myself...

July 24, 2018 - 9:21pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Susan Cody)

Yeah I have thought it was relating to her MS and thinking by doing this excessive exercise it would somehow stop it, or stop it from worsening...

Or that it was some sort of eating disorder, she's gone from 15 stone to down to 7 stone... and doesn't seem to be stopping...

Mum doesn't want to address it with a doctor as she's worried my sister will lose her benefits, which they do rely on... so I just don't know what to do, I feel she needs therapy myself...

July 24, 2018 - 5:47am
HERWriter Guide (reply to Anonymous)

Hi again

She will not lose benefits if she has a psychological illness that is causing this. MS may have contributed to this - it's possible the medication she is taking for MS may have triggered it too. She has lost half her weight and definitely requires an intervention.
Best,
Susan

July 24, 2018 - 6:07am
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Susan Cody)

Thanks Susan... I was thinking of taking her out for lunch tomorrow, just the two of us and having a chat with her... She has made promises before mind to cut down, and that never happens...

She wakes up at 4 am, and starts the routine, she does take a break in the middle of the exercise, but usually finishes it around 12 pm... and is there exhausted (understandable)

Originally she wanted to get down to 8 and half stone, but the targets keep getting lower, I believe she's now under 7 and a half stone, and just doesn't look healthy at all.

July 24, 2018 - 6:17am
HERWriter Guide (reply to Anonymous)

I think taking her out to lunch is a good idea. Based on what you have said, she does need professional therapy. See if you can broach the subject with her.
Susan

July 25, 2018 - 11:08am
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