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Is it normal to dislike your boyfriend's mom?

By June 9, 2012 - 11:01am
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My fiance and I have been together for three years and I absolutely can't stand his mom. He doesn't like my mom either. But his mom makes me angry on so many levels on a daily basis. She undermines my accomplishments and acts like I'm some whore who took her 20 year old son's virginity. She is very religious and constantly is walking in and out of my fiance's room for no reason. She diminishes our sex life almost entirely. Unfortunately he still lives with her although we should be in our own place together by the end of the summer. She just lacks respect of our privacy and I understand it's her house but it's so frustrating. She also is one of those people that starts talking and never stops... She's even made snide comments about my weight and talks about how small she is! I don't even want to breastfeed my future children just because she did and I dislike her so much! It doesn't feel healthy to dislike her so much but I've tried time and again to get along with her. She treats my fiance like a baby and alienates me. IS this normal? :(

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No problem, I hope your relationship gets better!


June 13, 2012 - 6:02am

Hi Girly K,

My mother always told me that you can't please or like every single person you meet-- this includes mother-in-laws. It's very easy to feel irritated by someone who is a constant factor in your and your fiance's life but for the sake of your relationship and your upcoming marriage, it may be wise to take her comments with a grain of salt. This doesn't mean that if she crosses the line and blatantly disrespects you that you have to suck it up, but pick your battles-- she'll be around for a while and will always be his mother. 

Regarding breastfeeding, millions of mothers breast feed and this should not be personalized to her. Breast milk is the best source of food for infants and it would be a shame to let your disdain for someone get in the way of what is best for YOUR children. So, let this thought ease its way out of your head-- she did not create breastfeeding. 

I wish you the best in your relationship with her and hopefully once you move out and you see less of her you'll be able to tolerate her a little better.

All the best,


June 9, 2012 - 2:27pm
(reply to Rosa Cabrera RN)

Thank you so much for your response! I really like what you said and it's made me feel better about the situation :)

June 12, 2012 - 5:38pm
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