My husband passed away when I was 34 years of age. We had a very good and active sex life. When he passed I was was left with 4 young children, no job and away from the workforce for nearly a decade . I dove into taking care of my children and after a year or so started night classes to get a college degree. With raising 4 young children, night classes 3 or 4 days a week plus going back to work full time any thought of dating was put on a very back burner. After awhile life was so busy I never even thought about it. This past spring I went on a cruise out east and met a charming man. He was part of the crew and was very polite. We ran into each other while on shore one afternoon and we walked and talked. By the end of the walk I was unknowingly holding his hand. He said many sweet things to me but being agentleman the whole time. Back on the ship we could tell there was a connection but because he was crew we could not really get more of a chance to talk much again. When the cruise was over and I disbarked I had a heavy feeling in the pit of mt stomach. I thought it would go away after a few days. This did not happen. Once I was home I could get no relief from these feelings. This man had awaken my sexual feelings from a 3 decade sleep. What am I to do? He is half way around the world. Is mastubation enough to satisfy my desire? I am at a loss as the only man I have ever dated or been with is my husband. I am a fairly shy person. Is it possible to get back into dating or will my new vibrator be my only sexual relief.