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me and my bf have been together almost 2 years . Lately he hasnt been wanting sex. He used to want it all the time. My looks havent changed or anything. I love him. What doi do? And why is he acting like this? Im pretty sure hes not cheating.

By November 29, 2010 - 11:32pm
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Im 20 and hes 27.

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thank you but i have already tried that.he said its not me and he loves me. But i still dont understand whats going on.

December 1, 2010 - 5:03pm
(reply to tonya2010)

That's not really effective communication, right?

His answer is a non-answer "it's not you". If you still don't understand, then he did not communicate effectively, and/or you were not receiving the message effectively.

Either way, if you both are interested in improving the relationship, you both sit down together and talk about what it IS. How to solve the problem (counseling is an option), and what you both expect to have in a mutually happy and healthy relationship. What is his ideal sexual relationship, and how does he want to get there? What is yours? Are you both willing to work and care about each other's concerns and feelings? Are you both sexually compatible, and how are other aspects of the relationship?

These are all things you and he need to address, together, either between you two or with a counselor as a guide.

good luck!

December 2, 2010 - 10:57am

Ask him why he is uninterested in having sex; there can be numerous reasons, and communicating with him is most important. We can only speculate if he is stressed, tired, not in love anymore, medical condition, etc. We have had many discussions on this topic that you will find at EmpowHER, and most important: ask your boyfriend, talk with him about your feelings, and you two can create an intimate relationship if you both are still invested.

You can read more at: https://www.empowher.com/community/ask/why-doesnt-my-husband-want-me?page=17

November 30, 2010 - 11:38am
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