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My boyfriend and I have never had sex :(

By Anonymous August 8, 2015 - 2:59am
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I have been with y boyfriend for just over 5 months now and we have never been intimate. He said he has had sex with 15 other people and he also watches porn but won't have sex with me because he is emotionally attached to me. I've tried to stimulate him (that didn't work) so I then tried not trying. He used to suffer with depression about 5 years ago but said he got over it. He is a very kissy and cuddly guy but he never lets it go further, he just rolls over and tries to go to sleep. :(

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this is not good for you sorry to hear about this situation about your boyfriend

September 1, 2015 - 9:02am

I'm so sorry to hear about your situation and I'd love to give you some helpful advice on the matter.
The first thing you should consider is whether or not your boyfriend was in romantic relationships with any of these other 15 people he had sex with. If he did not, there in lies your answers.
From what you have said, I think your boyfriend may struggle with self-confidence. I know this sounds crazy since he has been 15 other partners. However, if they were only a one and done kind of scenario, then he did not get any feedback about his performance. This lessens the chances of failure/embarrassment considerably.
He really cares about you, from what he says; and I think he may be avoiding sex because he does not want to run the risk of letting you down.
This is only speculation from the little information you have shared. However, you may want to encourage more conversation about the subject with him. Be sensitive to his needs and try to use "I" statements instead of "you" statements.
For example instead of "you never want to have sex with me," say "I feel sad that I can't have sex with you."
I wish you luck. If you have any more questions feel free to ask us here at EmpowHer.

August 8, 2015 - 8:21pm
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