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I've been dating my boyfriend on&off now for almost a year.As you can tell from the on&off bit its been a rocky relationship.with a lot of stress but I don't think what happend lastnight had anything to do with that because we have been spending more time apart doing our own things and we have been getting along and having sex I'm sure not as often as he seems he would like but when we do its great&adventerous. You see I'm a professional bikini/lingire model I've never had trouble getting a mans attention. Until him granteed he is open that he doesn't like my profession he's still a guy. And it drives me nuts that I don't seem to drive him nuts unless we are in the act of having sex! It saddens me I feel more desired by strangers than the one man I allow to touch me and give my heart to. Lastnight we were having a great time I had just gotten out of the shower and fixed me hair and put on a little lipgloss and came out naked and asked him if hed rub lotion on me. He did so asif he was doing a job and had no sexuality behind it at all. But I didn't give up then I stood in front of him where he sat and started caressing myself and he didn't even look up! Then I gaveup and just threw on one of his ragadey old T-shirts and he instantly says "you look sexy." I was so upset I took off his ugly t-shirt! I'm so confused and feel so unappriciated that its killing my sex drive!please help!
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Of course it is possible where as I've learned not to rule anything out but I don't know I'm not sure I know he's hearts there the guy tattoed my name below his belt line after what happend when he was trying to show his devotion and was trying to get me back. He also moved almost instatntly into a new apartment as he said he wanted to start fresh and feel as comfortable as possible. He recently has began a close relationship with god and swears up and down whenever I ask him if he has seen her or spoke to her again. While he was lotioning me he told me later after I got upset that he wasn't into looking at me naked because lotioning me had desensitized me...whatever he meant there I can only guess. I used to turn him down a lot when we first got back together after what happend now it seems the other way around he only wants me when he knows its a sure thing. It bothers me so much because after what happend I question myself so much I want to be certain I'm the apple of his eye and I'm not so sure even though he always tells me that I'm the most beautiful woman he's been with & I know he loves me it still doesn't seem enough when push comes to shuv. I suppose he would go to conseling but if he is cheating and hasn't told me yet I doubt he will. When it first happend he told right away to my face I can only hope he would give me that respect again if something happend...
May 24, 2010 - 3:51pmThis Comment