My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half now. Overall, things are okay, but I am worried that my boyfriend may be addicted to drugs and alcohol. Whenever the slightest thing goes wrong he turns to alcohol or prescription drugs to make himself feel better. To make things worse his mother shares her Vicodin and anti-anxiety medications with my boyfriend. Although, it is very likely that he suffers from anxiety, he is uninsured and has not been diagnosed by a doctor. I think his mother is trying to help him with his anxiety, but does not consider the damage that may be occurring from sharing her prescriptions. Whenever he claims he has back pain he asks her for Vicodin, which she gives him. She also gives him a monthly allowance of Vicodin, which he seems to run out of very quickly.
My boyfriend's mom is very accommodating to her sons. She often tries to avoid any conflict, as she never sets any boundaries or house rules for her adult sons. Both of her adult sons (age 29, and age 31) live with her. She pays all the bills, buys their food, pays their car insurance and phone bills. At times they are both very rude and disrespectful towards her. She does nothing to defend herself, in this way she allows them to control her.
I'm not sure if it is my place to confront her. I have been fighting my urge to do so, as I feel I am invading their family privacy. I love my boyfriend, and I only want for him to do better, but as time goes on I can no longer ignore the reality in front of me. I know I could walk away from all of this, but I at least want to try to help before I decide what I need to do for myself.