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WE HAVE HAD ISSUES WITH THIS SEX THING FOR 10 MONTHS. IT HAS TAKEN MY SELF ESTEEM DOWN.
LAST WEEK HE SAID THAT ME HAVING A BABY RUINED ME BEFORE THAT IT WAS HIS HEADACHES. SIX MO AGO I PUT ON LINGERE NEW. HE SAID I WILL BE BACK IN A MINUTE. HE NEVER CAME BACK. BUT HE DID TAKE MY PURSE N CLOTHES UPSTAIRS SO MY ROOMATE WOULD NOT STEEL.
NEXT MORNING I ASKED WHY? HE SAID I WAS DRUNK. SO WHATS NEW I SAID. WHY DID YOU NOT WAKE ME UP,, HE SAID I HAD A HEADACHE. IS HE USING ME ? HE HAS TO BE INTOXICATED SO I THINK T0 BE WITH ME. THAT IS JUDT S TIP OF PROBLEM. CAN YOU PLEASE HELP ME ? my self esteem is horrible and i am very cute n sexy
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Add a Comment5 Comments
Holly,
A baby does not "ruin" you. A baby only makes you a better, stronger woman. I am a bit appauled that your boyfriend would say this to you. Is he Chey's father? If he is, he's got no sense to recognize that you gave him the most priceless gift he will ever receive from a woman-- their child. If he is not, this is not a man you want to have around your little one. I don't even want to think about things he may say to you when Chey is around.
At the risk of sounding extremely insensitive to him, A man who thinks women are "ruined" after creating, carrying, and giving birth to life is not worth your time. Please let us know if there is anything we can do to help. Hugs to you!
Keep us posted.
September 29, 2009 - 5:12amThis Comment
Hi, Anon, and welcome to EmpowHer. I'm so sorry this is happening to you.
Women have babies all the time, and they are not "ruined." That's an excuse, and a mean one, that your boyfriend is using. It sounds like he knows exactly what buttons to push to hurt you, and like Alison said, that's not healthy.
So you and the baby live with a roommate who can't be trusted? Is that the situation? Do you feel that you and the baby are safe?
Is your boyfriend the baby's father? If so, does he show concern and love for the baby?
Please don't be embarrassed. I'm glad you wrote and asked this question. Do you feel you have any alternatives to live in another place?
September 28, 2009 - 9:12amThis Comment
I GOT RID OF THAT ROOMATE LAST YEAR. I JUST THOUGHT IT WAS AKWARD THAT MY BOYFRIEND MOVED MY CLOTHES. YES, CHEY AND I ARE IN A SAFE PLACE. MY BOYFRIEND TOLD ME HE SAID THAT TO HURT ME, I HAVE TO ADMIT I STARTED IT WITH SOMETHING MEANER BECAUSE I WAS HURT OVER HIM WANTING TO GO OUT WITH A FEMALE FRIEND. HE HAS THE ABIITY TO BE VERY MOODY AND I WISH HE WAS MORE CONSISTANT WITH HIS NICE SIDE. ONE WEEK HIS SEX DRIVE IS GREAT, NEXT WEEK HE IS COLD. I DO NOT USE SUBSTANCES, HE DOES. MAYBE THAT IS HIS PROBLEM. I AM TIRED OF TRYING TO FIGURE IT OUT.
September 29, 2009 - 2:31amTHANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE CONCERN. AT LEAST I KNOW SOMEONE CARES. WELL, I HAVE TO GO AND GET CHEY READY FOR SCHOOL. SINCERELY, HOLLY
This Comment
I agree with Allison's comments and everyone deserves to be treated well. It is how you present yourself sometimes though that may present such an issue.
Allison's concerns about drugs and alcohol are certainly genuine in this situation. Is everything okay? You also mentioned that your purse and clothes were moved so your roommate would not steal them...are you in a safe environment?
Please let us know.
September 27, 2009 - 9:06amThis Comment
At the very least, this does not sound like a healthy relationship on many levels, but what is most important is taking care of yourself. Any person who tells you a life experience has "ruined you" is not worth being around. Life is too short to spend your time and emotional energy on people who do not bring out the best in you.
Were you intoxicated at the time? You said it was "nothing new", so I'm wondering if you are using alcohol (or other substances) in unhealthy ways. Can you tell us how much you drink, and how often?
Was your boyfriend also drinking, too? If so, how much and how often is his usual amount (daily or weekly)?
You had a baby? Are you raising the baby?
September 27, 2009 - 6:32amThis Comment