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want to know if ma man really loves me

By February 14, 2010 - 2:08am
 
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i have a boyfriend who never gives me any money maybe 100 , this same man does not tell me he loves me not even a message , but he only tells me he loves me when we are in bed and he is enjoying sex, he cannot even buy me a present whether its valentines or ma birthday but me have ever bought him,this is a man who tells me he will not wed and me ma dream is to wed, he writes on his face book wall that he loves his girlfriends without discrimination, i love this man so much we have been dating for 10months now, but i feel he is not the right man what do i do i want to leade him but i still love him

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Atoti,

Miscortes gave you some wonderful things to think about.

But I worry mostly because I hear you saying that this man does not live up to the things you want for yourself. If your dream is to someday get married and he will never marry, than the two of you are not going to work out in the long run.

Money and presents are not the things that should make you decide whether to leave this man. But the fact that he doesn't tell you he loves you unless you are in bed worries me. And the fact that he says on his Facebook page that he has "girlfriends," plural, worries me. And the fact that you want to get married and he doesn't worries me.

I know you love him. But sometimes we have to leave people we love in order to find the person who is REALLY meant for us. As long as you are with this man, it's guaranteed that you won't find someone who will treat you better or look toward the long term.

Ask yourself, do you think you can really be happy with a man who doesn't share your dreams?

February 16, 2010 - 9:04am
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

Thank you for your question. Can I ask how old you and your boyfriend are?

My first thought about your question is that maybe you are basing love on physical things. You can fall in love with a man who has nothing on this earth to offer you but may treat you like a queen emotionally. Does he have the means to buy you things and choses not to?

Why are you in love with him? What does this specific man do for you that you cannot live without? What makes you stop thinking about any other man that you ever passed on the street to put yourself with this specific guy?

Remember there is one important thing to learn about relationships, you chose the person you intend to be with for the long haul, it is not the other way around. Remember there is something that keeps you near him although he may not buy you things or give you the last shirt on his back...but you chose him.

I hope this helps. You have more control in a relationship situation that you may know. Chose, love and don't think too much about quantity versus quality.

February 14, 2010 - 10:37am
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