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i desperatly need advice...Me and my boyfriend have only ben dating for 5 months! We get along so well we felt like we loved eachoter within the first few weeks, we feel so comfortable together and ive never felt like this with anyone before. He treats me so nice and is the perfect boyfriend except we are only having sex maybe 1 times a week, and sometimes only 1 time a fortnight - and we have been together only 5 months!!!! We are both really busy, he plays sport and trains at the gym 5 days a week and i just bought my own house so im always doing stuff around that, in the evening we just chill out and talk and cuddle in front of the tv. Ive been getting really upset about it lately and ive told him i dont think its right the amount of sex we are having. I love him so much but i feel that he should be grabbing me and telling me to get into the bedroom - actually desperatly wanting to have sex with me, but i dont know what it is. He's a really nice guy and i think maybe he just isnt like that he doesnt think with his dick, but me and my ex used to have it atleast 1-2 times a day for the whole year we were together and its hard now to go down to this.
I dont want to break up with him i honestly think he is the one, but im starting to think with out a sexual relationship were only great friends and maybe i need to cut my losses and move on. I really dont want to though i dont think there is another guy better than him in this world so i dont know what to do. PLEASE HELP
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Hi Strung,
I am familiar with your position. I also had a relationship that was very similar. My best advise to you would be to talk to him. Your relationship is very new and there is always that awkward time of getting to know each other and knowing each other's quirks. Sit him down and tell him, “You turn me on so much that I want to have sex with you constantly.” I am sure he will love to hear that.
I think it is funny your iteration about what you would like him to do to you. Tell him. He may be holding back himself thinking the same thing about you. Make a day where you can make him dinner, dress up nice and seduce him. Table talk about what you enjoy about sex and what your expecting out of the relationship. In my past relationships, men do not understand 'hint' language that we tend to utilize. They do not understand that when we lay next to them in a spooning position and try to position our buttocks up against them, this is a clue that we want them to initiate something. Instead, they will cuddle, right?
Lay what you are expecting from him out....in plain language...no hints. Make your conversation short and to the point. He will understand. As for the gentleman that chimed in on this post too, try the same thing on your new woman. Be very careful about blaming the lack of sex on your new girlfriend, instead explain how much you feel about her and that you want to be with her. Women will take this is talk in a good way or a bad way. Women do not want to hear that their man is lacking in sex. We want our men to be fully satisfied and trying to carefully talk to her about it, will make a huge difference. When things are new in a relationship, you must let your partner know what you are expecting from them. Could you both keep us posted?
March 27, 2010 - 8:50amThis Comment
same problem but sexes reversed. She is the one....im so stuck, ill favourite this page and wait for responses. Ive felt like ive downgraded too, but my girlfriend is of much better quality, and i think she is the one
March 27, 2010 - 7:52amThis Comment
by the way, im only 23 and he is 24
March 26, 2010 - 6:20pmThis Comment