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In Menopause, Out Libido?

By EmpowHER
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Guest Blogger
Holly McCarthy

There’s a lot that women have to go through in their lifetimes – at first, it’s the burgeoning sense of womanhood where your body starts to undergo changes that signal the end of innocence, then you endure your monthly menstrual cycle with all its aches, discomfort and inconvenience, after which you move on to pregnancy and motherhood, one of the best (and worst) experiences there is, and finally you have to go through the agony of menopause, your body’s way of telling you that you’ve reached the end of your fertile years.

All these stages are accompanied by random hormonal changes, erratic mood swings and a host of physical and mental complaints. But a woman still stoically bears it all; until she reaches menopause, that is. Perhaps it’s the fact that you’re growing old, or even the truth that you’re not in the prime of your health anymore; whatever the reason, menopause is one of the hardest conditions a woman has to bear. It comes with numerous side-effects, one of which is the loss of libido.

You may find yourself less interested in sex and even the acts leading up to it, and this is because of the decrease in the level of estrogen in your blood. This is the hormone that’s responsible for making the vagina wet and keeping it lubricated during sexual intercourse, so when you’re at the menopause stage, it’s normal to find yourself lacking the will and the desire to have sex.

Besides, you’re also likely to suffer from mood swings, depression, hot flashes, insomnia, stress and other health complications that arise because of the medication you’re taking. These are factors that contribute to the decrease in your libido. And when you find yourself unable to enjoy sex like you used to, you may find that your anxiety grows and adds to your stress level. The problem is compounded by other factors too – you may start wondering if you’ve become too old to enjoy a passionate night with your loved one, or if you don’t look as beautiful as you used to because of the side effects of menopause.

There’s a way to get around these problems and enjoy the twilight of your life when your kids have all left the nest and you’re alone with your spouse – you need to be aware of menopause and its complications. When you are informed of the causes and reasons for feeling the way you do, you’re not likely to feel the stress. You can make educated efforts to improve your relationship, by not focusing on sex alone and working on the bonding factor and the emotional closeness you enjoyed during your courtship.

Menopause is an inevitable part of life if you’re a woman, so the best we can do is to understand this process and be ready to tackle it head on.

Add a Comment16 Comments

Aging is inevitable. As well as menopause and perimenopause. Instead of dreading that day, why not prepare for it and deal with it in the most natural ways. Sharing this article I read recently that talks about symptoms and treatment.


March 10, 2015 - 11:36pm
EmpowHER Guest

Very depressing indeed. I was much more encouraged by some of the other articles I read. If I had it to do over, I would chose not to read this one.

August 6, 2010 - 2:31pm
EmpowHER Guest

Are you a man? And cheer up for goodness sake. What a potentially depressing and essentially useless read. Most women's experience is not so terrible and thankfully there is a wealth of easily accessible and useful information on menopause. Thumbs down to this so called article.

July 9, 2010 - 7:05am
EmpowHER Guest

What the hell kind of an article and title of an article was that Lisa Martinez of EmpowerHer? How about having some facts included with your depressing way describing something normal? We might as well be right back at the turn of the century. Just put us no longer useful, undesirable creatures far away from where anyone can see us.

Who the hell is taking medication? I'm not quite there to pump myself full of hormones. Sex is pretty awesome without worrying about pregnancy. Growing old? Not in the prime of health? What's wrong with me? The fact that I'm one year older than I was last year? I have a good mind to report you to your editor because this is drivel. In fact, I will. Good heavens. The thing one finds on the internet. I'll send you my address so you can have someone pick me up and put on a porch with a rocking chair and nice warm shawl. Sex is only to be had by 25 year old moist gals.

July 7, 2010 - 1:07am
EmpowHER Guest

How depressing and without much value, thanks for nothing

July 1, 2010 - 7:58am
EmpowHER Guest

I couldn't disagree more with this, i have increased libido and things are more lubricated then before, so it certainly isn't the same for every woman. There is hope out there yet for us girls !

June 30, 2010 - 12:22pm
EmpowHER Guest

Don't buy into the idea that it's the same for every woman!!! I paused at 45 and my libido is better than ever. So are my moods and general outlook on life. Menopause can open a whole new world, and it's not necessarily worse than the one before.

June 26, 2010 - 9:04pm
EmpowHER Guest

I am a 46 year old woman, and do not want to treat perimenopause and menopause as a disease. It is a natural part of life. I want to find articles on how to accept and enjoy our aging process. Our modern culture places all value on youth. We need to learn that their is value and worth in all stages of life. I am an RN and have seen many women at all stages of life and have found true beauty comes from within, not from chemicals, surgeries, or other attempts to find the fountain of youth.

May 12, 2010 - 10:28am
EmpowHER Guest


I have to enjoy the laugh also about the origins of the words above. I knew there was an underlying reason to our monthly insanity! You nailed it! Thanks for the laugh!

March 7, 2010 - 11:29am
EmpowHER Guest

oh my god, cheer up.

March 6, 2010 - 10:38pm
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