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I'm the breadwinner, he is chronically ill... oh the stress

By May 18, 2017 - 10:43pm

I've been married almost 17 years and we have three kids (15, 13 and 7). My husband suffers from a genetic disorder that causes many tumors and sometimes cancer (I donated my kidney to him in 2007 because of cancer). He is getting ready to have a brain surgery on June 5, 2017 and I am struggling because he wants a life that is the white picket fence and dancing through the daisies and yes he is scared of dying on the table. I am stressed which has him very upset. I work many hours, take care of the kids and make sure I have a little down time to myself. I struggle with being super compassionate to his horrible health because i have had it in my life for 20 years and he always makes it seem like he can handle it on his own. His mother, brother, sister and niece all died from this disease and our daughter has it too. I deal with the issues as they come up and don't dwell on it daily. When he gets stressed however he blames my lack of compassion on everything and all I want is to run away. Being away from it allows me to recharge so I can function . I do whatever I can to be away from the sad situation which I know is wrong but I do it anyways. I figure that I have to recharge in order to work and be here for the kids. Sex in nonexistent because of my lack of interest and OMG is it an issue. we are more like roommates which I am ok with but he is not. I could write a book. Anyone else want to run away from the home because of a spouse that has horrible health?

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