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Anyone Afraid They Are Old???? Approaching 49...HELP!! Join this Group

Anyone Afraid They are Old????

By September 18, 2010 - 10:05pm

I've crested 50 now and I sometimes awake at night, afraid of not "getting everything done" before I get old, of my life not mattering to many. We can't change the number of revolutions around the sun we've gone, but we can make them more meaningful--be more present with those we love, be of service to others. I often TRY these, but of course, fail quite often. Don't be afraid, be emboldened to do better!

By January 23, 2012 - 8:31am


Menopause is a very personal issue to alot of people and many of us have different symptoms. When I started to have signs I immediately marched into my doctor and told her I needed hormones. She's a very agreeable person and prescribed some for me. Three weeks later my breasts hurt so bad I could hardly wear a bra. Ah.....one of the side effects of hormones. Then....I developed acne. It was great....walking around with sore boobs and zits! I threw the hormone pills away. I have fans at my office, in my bedroom, by the couch to breeze away the nasty hot flashes. When it was non stop hot flashes I purchased some estrogen cream that I'd rub on my wrists in the mornings and it helped a bit.
Otherwise I've gone thru it naturally. Mood swings. Crying spells. I've had several pity parties where I schlep around the house in my sweats with uncombed hair eating right out of a tub of tapioca pudding watching DVR'd episodes of Bridezillas. Then I'm okay when I compare myself to the Bridezillas. (LOL)
Take it a day at a time. Breathe deeply. Stretch. Lift weights. Pray. Meditate. Embrace life. Examine where you are now and where you came from. Laugh. If you have granchildren color with them. If you don't, go for a walk and listen to the sounds around you.

Every day is a gift. Accept it as such.

January 23, 2012 - 8:31am
By January 23, 2012 - 8:19am

Hello Susan Cody,

I feel the same as you and often wonder why people dread the aging process. Personally, I'm not looking forward to being dependent upon others to care for me when I'm well into my doteage, and do everything I can now to ensure my independence, but I also hope that when the day comes I will face it with grace and humor.

My heart goes out to Diva30 and the situation she finds herself in. I can only hint at what I'd have said to Mr. Lewis after my hystie if he'd have given any indication things were not as they used to be or as he liked.

Life, marriage, work.....all are what a person makes of them. I always try to have fun at everything. Diva.....don't let your husband criticize or diminish you in any way. If he does you'll have to decide if your life is better with or without him. No one needs someone second guessing them every step of the way. You did what you did for your health and quality of life. And that's that.

Have a wonderful day and be happy. Be your best. Do your best.

January 23, 2012 - 8:19am
By January 22, 2012 - 8:10am

Hello Ladies,

I am rapidly approaching 60. Had a hysterectomy when I was 35, kept my ovaries and went thru natural menopause but without the menstrual mess between the hystie and the 'pause. I've never felt 'old'. The mirror tells me otherwise but my eyes tell my real age....about 32. I feel wonderful even tho I am full of aches and pains, regrets and misgivings. That's what life is. Life is an eternal and ongoing lesson in improvement. I wish I had a way to show all of you that aging is a wonderful and very natural thing. Own your age but don't necessarily act it.
I would never go back to my younger years of uncertainty, insecurity, easy embarassment or feelings of inadequacy. I'm more confident, strong and self assured than I've ever been and I have my age to thank for it.
Love yourselves and love your age.

January 22, 2012 - 8:10am
By November 27, 2011 - 4:36pm

Susan, He just dont get it. We had sex for the first time since my surgery and it was like being 16 again I was scared. He was careful and apparently he claimed he could not go in all the way (could've fooled me) anyway he then said if felt differen cause he couldn't feel the lip of my cervix. Is that even possible and how would he know what it felt like anyway. I laughed and he said no it was true, so is he just being a jerk or is that possible.

November 27, 2011 - 4:36pm
By November 15, 2011 - 5:14pm

Im fine and no my husband is not very supportive, which is difficult. My job is very stressful and demanding at times, I have a love hate relationship with my job. I think that both of these things make me feel old. I am glad I had the surgery I feel it is going to improve the quality of my life at this point. I am looking forward to getting back to 100%

November 15, 2011 - 5:14pm
By November 9, 2011 - 3:15pm

I did get to keep my ovaries, which I was glad about. I am feeling better and unfortunately will be going back to work. Today for some reason I felt really depressed about the whole thing. I am not to concerned about sex as much as my husband . He also told me that my short term memory has gotten worse since I had it done. He read thats a side effect. I think I will use that and just say I forgot how to have sex!

November 9, 2011 - 3:15pm
By October 30, 2011 - 4:43pm

The thing I would like to do before I get old is to know what it feels like to make love again. I had an unexplained loss of pleasure during intercourse when I was only 21 and 14 years later, when I thought things couldn't get any worse, I lost all my clitoral feeling as well. I'm 48 now. I finally convinced a doctor to refer me for a muscle biopsy, which I have in January. I do have a rare genetic muscle disorder in my family. I tested normal for the blood levels which means that, in me, it can be limited to muscle. I just want to get better and do what one would usually take for granted...getting married and making love. I want to feel young before I have to feel old. That's the one thing that scares me about getting old. I'm not ready for that yet.

October 30, 2011 - 4:43pm
By October 28, 2011 - 7:14am

I would love advice on menopause without hormone replacement as well as with! I will be 50 soon and am so confused by it all!

October 28, 2011 - 7:14am
By October 27, 2011 - 9:52pm

Hello Diva: I'm sorry you had a hysterectomy!! did they take your ovaries out also or just a complete hyestectomy? If they left your ovaries your menopause will not be to bad, and your sexual life will come back to you soon. Your ovaries produce the sexual hormone and hormones for your skin. If you had a compleate hystectomy then you will have take an estrogen supplement, like Premarin, that will help you with your mood and it makes your hormones start working again, the only thing is that you may have to use lubricants during intercouse and you will have to keep yourself well hydrated and creamed. Don't worry of what your husband tells you. You are still a woman and you have to maintain your posture. Do what you need to do for yourself and the rest put it in God's hand and he will make all better.

October 27, 2011 - 9:52pm
By October 27, 2011 - 3:39pm

I am now at home recovering from my hysterectomy. I am 44 and I cant wait to get back to work. Having the surgery made me feel old and having a husband tell me I just wrecked my life does not make me feel any better. So sitting here at home only makes me feel more old and useless. He said Im never gonna wanna have sex again. Honestly I didnt want to before. He thinks its gonna feel different. I had to have the surgery due to bad endometriosis, and I mean bad.

October 27, 2011 - 3:39pm

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