Put Your Guilt Away

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No one can make you feel guilty unless you let them. But a lot of us feel guilty a lot of the time. Modern moms feel guilty if we are not at school every day for pickup or do not attend all of the endless birthday parties or can’t cheer on every sporting event for all of our children. However, if you live your life trying to uphold modern mommy madness, it becomes difficult to be happy. Because you cannot keep up with everything and still be good to yourself.

The reality is that you cannot take good care of others until you stand on your own two feet. That would require taking excellent control of yourself, asking for help when you need it, being able to say no, and remaining committed to living your best life.

-If you feel guilty for taking time for yourself, remind yourself of all that you do for others.
Review your weekly schedule and recognize how much you do to run your household and care for your family. Most mothers are actually shocked when they add up the time and energy they put into caring for everyone in their family.

-Recognize that you cannot be strong for others until you are a foundation of strength for yourself.
Unless your tank is full, you can’t give very much to anyone else. If you are running on empty you may feel spread too thin. When your tank is full, you feel cheerful, happy and have much more to give with those around you.

-Stop the continuous mommy guilt.
When you spend quality time with your children, listen to them regularly, and interact consistently with your family, you are providing your children with what they need. They are your priorities in life, but they do not define you as a person. It is important that they understand that you have a life outside of them. You can let them know that you will do your best to attend their functions and be an important part of their life but that you also have personal needs that need to be respected.

It is so important to stand strong with your values and priorities. You are too good to feel guilty and remember to take care of yourself!

Source: Simpson, B. (2006). The Balanced Mom.

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We value and respect our HERWriters' experiences, but everyone is different. Many of our writers are speaking from personal experience, and what's worked for them may not work for you. Their articles are not a substitute for medical advice, although we hope you can gain knowledge from their insight.