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Secrets to a Successful Marriage

By HERWriter
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Secrets for a Successful Marriage puhhha/Fotolia

I asked my husband the other day what makes a successful marriage. He said, "Communication is key."

After a long pause and a sly belly laugh, he continued and said, "And, my wife is always right."

Yes, I am married to a man who thinks he is a part-time comedian, but laughter is also the key to any marriage.

For example, SELF Magazine recently listed the "21 Best Pieces of Marriage Advice" by long-time couples. One of the pieces of advice is to make laughter the soundtrack of your marriage.

Laughter has solidified our marriage, especially after one of us makes a silly financial mistake or a household error.

Some other advice in the SELF Magazine feature includes:

• Remembering that marriage isn’t 50/50. Marriage has to be 100/100 and both partners have to give everything they’ve got.

• Give your best to each other, not your leftovers after you’ve given your best to everyone else.

• Surround yourself with friends who will strengthen your marriage.

• In arguments, remember that there won’t be a "winner" and a "loser." Work together to find a solution.

• Learn from other people, but don’t feel the need to compare your life or your marriage to anyone else’s.

• Don’t put your marriage on hold while you’re raising your kids. That could result in empty nest and an empty marriage.

I recently asked Delia Vallejo of Andover, Massachusetts why her marriage is strong. Vallejo has been married for over 10 years, moved several times across the country and has two amazing children.

She said, "The key to our marriage is unconditional support and knowing that we have each other’s back."

Kids, moving and careers can put pressure on any marriage, yet Vallejo has one of the strongest marriages I have witnessed over the years. They roll with the punches and will ultimately celebrate many anniversaries together. Vallejo and her husband also have similar core beliefs.

"Secrets to a Successful Marriage from 700 Retirees." CBSNews. CBS Interactive. Web. 21 Feb. 2016.

YourTango. "The 21 Best Pieces Of Marriage Advice, According To Longtime Couples." Web. 21 Feb. 2016. 

"The Secret to a Long-lasting Marriage." Washington Post. The Washington Post, Web. 21 Feb. 2016.

"How to Find Lifetime Love: 10 Secrets from Couples Married for Decades." TODAY.com. Web. 21 Feb. 2016.

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We value and respect our HERWriters' experiences, but everyone is different. Many of our writers are speaking from personal experience, and what's worked for them may not work for you. Their articles are not a substitute for medical advice, although we hope you can gain knowledge from their insight.

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