“It is written.” That’s the last line of the movie from India, called Slum Dog Millionaire. It’s a gripping and often shocking story of how fate unfolds along what seem to be universal laws. One of these laws is how much your destiny depends on your desire--be it love, money, or something else. The other is, love is the happier destiny.
I like to believe it was destiny that had a hand in the return of the Prince (my younger boyfriend) after a recent breakup. But destiny is never that linear. First, it had to teach me two important lessons about the thing I have always desired--love.
Lesson number concerns a memory from six years ago. I was at a bar with friends, being held captive by the ebullient ravings of Jennifer. Jennifer is a slinky blonde with a flirtatious nature that could only be described as omnivorous (bisexual) and gluttonous. She had just returned from some Miracle-of-Love type of workshop and was splattering the crowd with platitudes and clichés.
I rolled my eyes with boredom, causing Jennifer to lunge at me with a raised, admonishing finger. “You either live in love or fear,” she said warningly. “Love cannot exist where there is fear.” I smelt the gin and tonic on her breath and pushed her away.
Still, the line kept coming back to me. I didn’t know what it meant but I felt I should, as though I needed to understand it.
Then the next lesson came. My friend and co-author,Chris Heward (EmpowHer Expert), got diagnosed with cancer at age 59. He was a scientist who studied anti-aging medicine. He knew everything and then he was dead after a few horrible months.
I sat there one day recently reflecting on all this, trapped in what could only be described as a convergence of clichés. The come and gone nature of life. The fear or love, nature of mind. How we only have the moment. How you don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone.
I got to seeing how afraid I had been of loss, failure, and rejection. I had defended myself so hard against my fears that I wound up inviting them back into my life and even giving them their own rooms.