If you are a parent of an anorexic or bulimic and thinking about pursuing the Maudsley approach, reading Harriet Brown’s account of her experience will help you understand how much participation is involved. Harriet Brown is an author, teacher and co-chair of the Maudsley Parents, and her article, “One Spoonful at a Time,” was in the New York Times.
Brown writes, “That summer, Kitty was 14. She was 4-foot-11 and weighed 71 pounds. I could see the angles and curves of each bone under her skin. Her hair, once shiny, was lank and falling out in clumps. Her breath carried the odor of ketosis, the sour smell of the starving body digesting itself.” This is what anorexia looks and smells like. There is nothing stylish or sexy about it.
Anorexia is a killer. And what does a mother do when a killer wants to obliterate one of her children? She battles “the demon,” as Harriet calls anorexia. And Harriet and her husband waged an heroic battle against this deadly disorder.
Harriet’s daughter became anorexic when the Maudsley approach wasn’t well-known in the United States. So while researching the Maudsley method, Harriet writes that “…two studies showed that 90 percent of the adolescents recovered or made significant gains; five years later, 90 percent had fully recovered. (Two other studies confirmed these results.)” She wanted to find a treatment option that didn’t include the hospital, feeding tubes and as Harriet writes, “a parentectomy,” and she did: the Maudsley approach.
Using this approach was controversial, and as parents, they had no idea if it was right. It just felt better than the other options. But it was challenging, Harriet writes, “She [Harriet’s daughter] sat in front of the cake, crying. She put down the fork, said her throat was closing, said that she was a horrible person, that she couldn't eat it, she just couldn't. We told her it was not a choice to starve. We told her she could do nothing until she ate — no TV, books, showers, phone, sleep.”
I like another insistent remark that Harriet used when her daughter was being particularly difficult, she writes, “Food is your medicine and you’ve got to take it.” Amen.