Cyndie recalls how she feels when she looks at photographs of herself before losing weight.
When I look at the photos of the old Cindie, I always thought I was beautiful, to tell you the truth, but what I also see in those pictures is somebody hiding behind humor because I used to make fun of myself. In a way that to make other people not feel bad, I would make fun of myself, but I also see, to me it’s just like a lost soul. I don’t feel like I was complete because that’s not how I wanted to be.
That’s not how I wanted to be; that’s not how it should be, and so I hid behind, you know, trying to look a certain way or be a certain way, but it was never really me. And that’s why now I feel like, when I said before that I felt invisible, I had to do something extra special to make myself visible, and now I don’t have to make myself visible. Everybody sees me, and it’s not as important for anybody to see me anymore because now I am just fine with myself. I am much more comfortable in myself, and so it makes no difference to me what people think anymore.