Cyndie explains how her husband has reacted to the dramatic weight loss she has seen since undergoing gastric bypass surgery.
I have been married for 22 years. It’s a long time, and he has loved me unconditionally through all those years, but I think that it’s also insecurity in him because if you have a fat wife, nobody is going to take her from you, you know? And even though my personality has always been outgoing and I don’t have any problem making friends, and I have never had a problem dating or having men in my life ever, but, still, I always used to say I appreciated him loving me, like I feel sorry for myself, you know? “Thank you for loving me,” you know, which now I see is ludicrous.
But, he was angry when I did this surgery. One, because I didn’t ask him if I could, but it’s not him, it’s me, and other things upset him that he sees that I have gone through since the surgery, you know, because you have throwing up, not being able to eat, you know, things like that. And it upsets him, but, you know, he has issues with touching me. He says he feels like he is touching another woman, you know, but I truly believe that you can’t make a decision like this for anybody else but yourself. It has to be done for you, you know?
You love your husband; he loves you. Everything will work out. If it wasn’t meant to be, you know, they always will say, “Oh, I knew you were going to leave me because you had this surgery.” No, it doesn’t have anything to do with the surgery. If the marriage wasn’t good, it wasn’t good before. It doesn’t make a difference if you are fat or skinny--makes no difference.
So, you know, as far as my husband goes, he is fine. You know, he is adjusting. It’s only been four and a half months, you know, but he will be fine, you know, and we will be fine. But it’s just something that I think is important for other women to know that, you know, your husband may not agree with this decision, but you have to decide within yourself why are you doing it; who you are doing it for? You know, is it a health reason? If it is, you know, you are the one that’s got to be around for those children or you are the one that’s got to be around for him or to take care of whomever in your life, you know, or if you want to just excel in your life, you want to go to school, you want to feel comfortable, you want to feel confident. Any of those things are important to you, you know? You decide for yourself. Don’t let anybody else make that decision for you.