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Q: 

Could I be pregnant or am I just stressed/irregular

By Anonymous May 1, 2011 - 5:09pm
 
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Okay, so let me start off by saying, I have never in my life been regular, lol
I was always irregular 28-45-60 days sometimes, then when college started, i gained 25 lbs and since then, I have missed periods for months at a time. Took depo one month and had my period for 1 months straight. Then never got the shot again and didn't have my period for 1 whole year after that.

Well, i moved back in with mom, started on a decent diet, lost some weight, and stress went down. My periods were the most normal they've been in my life... For 1 year I lived there.

Then I moved out again (dec) and my periods were weird again. (gained more weight, moved x the country, etc. One month, it was so light, i hardly needed to use many pads. The next month it was on time, march it was on time.

Now here's where it gets tricky. My last period was on March 23.

Then, 30 days later, on April 21, I didn't get my period.

I had no sex at all, or sexual encounters. Then, on April 25, I had sex. It was not protected at first, then we put a condom on. (I know, not the best move).

Anyway, Yesterday, April 30th, I wiped and it was a light brown.
It was like that all day. Then today It was a little heavier and I wore a pad and there is a little on the pad.
I felt crampy today a little for a couple of hours (like I had my period) but I wasn't bleeding.

I'm not sure what is going on.

I don't know when to take a test. Theoretically, I shouldn't have been ovulating.

Also, this month has been the most stressful in a long time.
The house we're renting to someone has been broken into 3x, I cleaned my heart out for my parents visit and stressed over how the house looked and my parents came over for a weekend and I found out they're having bad problems when they got drunk and were throwing things in my house and screaming, I found out i have mice living in my basement, my uncle died, insurance is giving me crap about break-ins, management team isn't doing their jobs, IRS wants the home buyers credit back because they said we moved out a day after we bought it (we lived there a year and are supposed to pay it back next tax season but they want the money now and we don't have it)... and i've been eating fast food every day almost, this month.

What should I do. I'm panicked because I'm a hypochondriac and I either think I'm pregnant (which would be a disaster) or I'm sick

also, im 22

Help?

Add a Comment8 Comments

Also, most women with "regular" 28-day periods ovulate about 2 weeks before their period.

Other women who are not on 28-day cycles, have irregular cycles or other reasons may not ovulate on this predictable schedule.

May 3, 2011 - 10:23am

or, it could be your period.

I am not sure why you have not concluded that the bleeding you are experiencing is a period that is slightly late, especially since your periods are usually irregular.

Do you have anyone you can talk to about all of the stressors in your life? It sounds really difficult right now, and we can help you find someone to talk to!

May 1, 2011 - 6:18pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Alison Beaver)

That's true. I was considering that it could be that. I just never had a few days of brown only. Usually, it's brown for a few hours then full blown bleeding by the end of that day. This is just new to me.

My boyfriend is very patient. We don't have sex often because I pannic even if we use a condom the whole time. I'm afraid to have sex and it sucks. We've been together for 6 years and haven't had sex much. I can't take pills because I have a problem with my heart and the pills can cause issues with blood clots.

I do try and talk to my boyfriend and family. My boyfriend is very stressed as well about the house and such so it's not very easy to talk to him. I try to talk to some people online. Who else would I talk to?

Thank you very much for responding to my post. I'm sure stressing about THIS isn't helping much either

May 1, 2011 - 6:28pm
(reply to Anonymous)

Have you looked into your other birth control options, since you have such a patient boyfriend? There are many more options available, other than condoms and hormonal contraceptives!

Condoms are a type of barrier method of birth control, and there are other barrier-types to consider: diaphram and cervical cap. The diaphram is up to 94% effective at preventing pregnancy (when used with perfect use), and the cervical cap is only about 86% effective. However, in your specific case (if you do not need STI/STD protection with a long-term monogamous relationship), you may be able to obtain "perfect use" with these types of birth control. Plus, if you and your boyfriend combine these barrier methods with the "pull out" or "withdrawal" method (he withdraws his penis from your vagina before ejaculating) the combined methods can be very effective.

The IUD- ParaGuard is another non-hormone containing birth control that many women have success with (it is 99% effective, similar to hormonal contraceptives including the pill), but some women also have pain or cramping or spotting associated with its use.

There are pros/cons to every type of birth control, but you do have options other than abstinence or condoms-only, since you are unable to use hormonal contraception. You can find more information about these at: Birth control effectiveness chart, and be sure to talk with your Gynecologist about all of your options as well.

This can help prevent one of the stressors in your life.

The other stressors in your life might be best discussed with a counselor...have you considered this? A counselor is someone who can guide you through stressful times in your life, suggest better coping mechanisms and stress relievers, and basically just provide a good empathetic ear that you can bounce ideas off of. If you work, go to school and/or have health insurance, this may be a very low-cost benefit just waiting for you!

When we are stressed, it is OK to worry and panic and worry some more. You may be focusing on your lack of period because in some way it's easier to deal with then all the other stressors right now. I think just identifying the stresses that are more important AND the ones you have control in changing are the only ones you should pay attention to right now. Make a list of what needs to be done, either who you need to talk to to fix it or who can help advocate for you. Whether you need more information or to vent to an empathetic listener, you have many coping mechanisms to try (other than just worrying...give yourself permission to worry for an hour, then get in gear and find a solution, or find someone to help you!).

We are hear if you want to talk anymore about this, too!

May 1, 2011 - 7:05pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Alison Beaver)

Thank you very much. Sometimes it's hard to get in gear and focus on things I need done with all the stress. I'm going to give what you suggest a try, starting tomorrow. Worry about the things I can change, make a list, etc. I really appreciate it.

I'll also talk to the doctor about other options. We are pretty sure we do not want kids but he is afraid to get snipped (just in case he changes his mind, even though he hates kids at almost 30), and I don't want to go for that kind of surgery because I am unsure if I want kids or not. Most of the time (98%) I don't want them.

I heard sometimes IUD's are easy to be felt during sex, or bumped out of place.

I'll see if we can find out about other methods. I felt a little better when we used the condoms with the spermicidal lube because I felt that it was two methods in one. I'm not sure if it was a false sense of security or not though.

I really appreciate all of your help

May 1, 2011 - 7:38pm
(reply to Anonymous)

There are some methods that can be "doubled up", so be sure to do some fact-checking so you KNOW if you are having a false-sense of security, or actually making a wise health choice. Check out the link I provided above, as it also shows a chart with the effectiveness rate of spermicide. (Spermicide can increase your risk of STDs, but is good as pregnancy prevention...and it does increase the effectiveness against pregnancy). Some spermicides are not good to use with condoms, however, so please make sure to review the information and ask questions (you can provide the brand name of the spermicide, and we can help you with this information).

Using the pull out method is also a good method to use as "extra" precaution with another effective birth control.

IUDs can not be felt during sex (they are placed in the uterus, and the penis is only in your vagina...it does not go through your cervix to get to your uterus). IUDs can be jarred out of place for some women, other women have no problems with them...you can talk with your doctor about this method, if you are a good candidate.

The diaphram and cervical cap would be inserted by you (one of them you need to be fitted for in your doctor's office), and they can be effective if used in combination with spermicide and/or pull out method.

You can also track your cycle, so you know when you are most fertile...it is just more information for you to know about your body.

I'm glad I could help. Take care!

May 1, 2011 - 9:00pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Alison Beaver)

I usually try to track but when I sometimes don't get it for months, it gets hard. I will usually not have sex between days 8 and 16, because i believe it's around 2 weeks into the cycle that you ovulate. I'll look it up again.

When you talk to someone, how does that work? You just tell them what's going on in your life? Is there a good website for that?

I've had so much happen in the last year and that's happening now, I wouldn't mind chatting with someone.

I lost my old family dog in October from old age (she was 14) then I lost my puppy in November from parvo, then I lost my adult dog (7) from unknown causes and my very first dog I got on my own (2 1/2 year old shep mix) from bloat (rushed him in for surgery but they couldn't save him and had to put him to sleep). My other adult family dog (that's 15 right now) is hanging in there but you can tell she's getting old.

I had everything else happen that I listed above this past month, and today I just found out that my aunt is losing her battle with colon cancer and probably doesn't have more than a few days to live.

I lost my grandfather in 07', my grandmother in 09' and it's just been very hard for me to deal with a lot of it. I fear death a lot and fear being alone and losing all my family and everything/everyone I care about (which it seems like what's happening).

My sister had a very bad boyfriend and back last October (halloween) he snapped when drunk, hit my sister, punched my bf in the face, threw my mom on the ground, threw a phone at me, and then ran off out of the house with his (not my sisters) 8 month old daughter in his arms. We were terrified for weeks that he would break in and hurt us again.

My life is a bit less than perfect and it just seems very hard to deal with at times.

May 2, 2011 - 11:41am
(reply to Anonymous)

That is a lot to deal with, and I am so happy to hear that you are open to talking with a counselor---this is EXACTLY the times that they are needed most.

You can find a psychologist in your area by looking at the American Psychological Association (APA) website: http://locator.apa.org/.

You can also begin your search through your health insurance, work or school, as they would have "preferred providers".

I can help you do some research, if you need more specific help. If so, send me a PM (private message) by clicking on my name, and send me your zip code (so I can find a local counselor) and the name of your health insurance, work or school... where ever you would like me to help you find resources, I am more than happy to help.

May 3, 2011 - 10:21am
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