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Could my boyfriend have given me HPV without knowing he has it?

By Anonymous March 29, 2011 - 4:58pm
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I've been in a committed relationship for nearly 2 years. I've recently discovered a flesh-colored bump on my labia majora which I am afraid may be a wart. I have an appointment with my doctor to confirm, however, I'm concerned that if I do have HPV, who did I get it from?

Is it possible that he's never had any warts yet was able to give it to me? Is it possible that after 18 months of sexual contact with him, I'm just now getting symptoms? Is it possible that another partner from 2 years ago gave it to me and it's just now appearing. I know I haven't been with anyone else - I hate to think he cheated on me. I'm under the impression that he could be infected and not even know it, and that he will never know unless he gets a wart.

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EmpowHER Guest

Thanks ladies. Kind of a bummer when the women has symptoms and the man doesn't, since he cannot be tested. If the results are positive, I hope our relationship can withstand. I'm afraid if I have it there's a chance he's going to be turned off by me out of fear of getting it; especially since he can't be tested and will never know if he has it without a symptom.

Bummed because we both got full STD screenings before switching from condoms to the pill after moving in together - I thought we were protecting ourselves and being responsible.

Hoping it's just a mole...

March 30, 2011 - 11:12am
(reply to Anonymous)

You were being responsible by taking those precautions and you should be proud of that. There are things in life that we have little or no control over and unfortunately, HPV is one of them.

Keeping my fingers crossed for you.

Please keep us posted!

March 31, 2011 - 5:39am
EmpowHER Guest

My question was more about the time line. How long from the time you are exposed to HPV does one start to show symptoms - weeks, months, years, or sometimes never?

March 30, 2011 - 8:42am
(reply to Anonymous)

In addition to Rosa's reply, here is information from the CDC website she provided, in effort to answer your question:
"HPV is passed on through genital contact, most often during vaginal and anal sex. HPV may also be passed on during oral sex and genital-to-genital contact. HPV can be passed on between straight and same-sex partners—even when the infected partner has no signs or symptoms.
A person can have HPV even if years have passed since he or she had sexual contact with an infected person. Most infected persons do not realize they are infected or that they are passing the virus on to a sex partner. It is also possible to get more than one type of HPV.
Very rarely, a pregnant woman with genital HPV can pass HPV to her baby during delivery."
So it is really hard to pinpoint when someone contracted HPV, and if it was you or he who passed it onto the other. Most people can have HPV and never show any kind of symptoms or problems. It is not like Herpes or HIV in that regard--those viruses typically are easier to tell where you got it from.
Hope that makes sense.

March 30, 2011 - 8:52am

Hi Anon,

It's good to hear that you will be visiting your doctor tomorrow.
Unfortunately, there is no real way of knowing if your boyfriend is a carrier of HPV although he may very well could've passed it on to you. Unless he develops warts on his penis, or any other changes in his penis-- many men don't show any symptoms at all.

The best way to protect yourself and your boyfriend is through condoms. For more information-- here is some helpful reading:

Keep us updated!


March 30, 2011 - 4:58am
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