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How do I forgive my husband for giving me HIV?

By March 27, 2012 - 4:44pm
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My husband gave me HIV... when I confronted him, he said he did not know he had HIV and that he did not know how he got it. I have been married 2 years now and a week ago I found out that he was born with HIV and his reason for that telling me before we got physical was that he did not want to lose me.

I would like to work on my marriage... but my emotions are like a roller coaster.
Please advise...

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Hello Cotton,
It is completely understandable and appropriate that you feel as if you are riding an emotional roller coaster. It is okay to feel angry, betrayed and sad.

Your husband is not to blame for contracting HIV since it was passed on to him at birth. However, it was irresponsible of him and he is to blame for withholding the fact that he was HIV positive. He put your health at risk.

Do you want to remain married to him? Do you want to work at forgiving him? The choice is yours. No one can judge you if you chose to work toward forgiveness or if you do not.

If you want to save your marriage, I suggest that you and your husband seek the professional help of a couple's or marriage counselor. Another option is to seek guidance from a trusted religious leader, such as a minister, priest or rabbi.


March 27, 2012 - 5:24pm
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