How many porn pictures on my husband's phone are too many?

By Anonymous September 6, 2013 - 5:22am

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I am married to the man of my dreams. We met 3 years ago (we are in our 40's) and had an immediate connection. Our relationship has been like a fairy tale. Our sex life is great, none of the inhibitions or hang ups of our younger days so fully satisfying and in my opinion pretty frequent (generally 2-3 times a week). I do have a stronger sex drive than he does and we have discussed this. (NOTE: my previous over 20 year marriage was completely sexless for over 7 years - NO cheating!) It is not a problem for either of us really, I would add a time or two a week but am very satisfied with our current state - usually due to demands of job etc. Our sex life is also a bit creative and very fun - nothing over the top but definitely have discovered a new side of myself with him (we experiment together). Anyway, I just recently discovered a rather large number of porn pictures on his phone. His "old" phone he had had since before I even knew him and there were over 2000!!! He got a new phone 2 months ago and today I discovered over 300 on the new phone! I was a bit taken aback. I am not against porn in general - it is something we have never talked about together but we do send eachother long "stories" by email over several days just for fun etc... so I think I am pretty open minded but this confuses me. I don't understand the need for these pictures when we have talked about the fact that if he ever wants sex more than we are having it I am game!!! I want this man that I love dearly all the time! What should I do? Do I just let it go, do I tell him I looked and found them and I am a little bothered? NOTE: This is a man who keeps his phone with him 24/7 - he plays games on it etc - Also - I have never seen him "hide" anything on his phone so I am assuming he is downloading them at work or when I am out??? CONFUSED!!! I would appreciate comments from anyone on either side of the fence on this one!

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Anonymous

Hi Anon,

If this is bothering you, It's important to communicate with him on what you discovered on his phone. He might have an explanation for this. Some people are addicted to porn and might need a little help to know why they need this. If you just let it go and not discuss with him, it might such make the relationship worst and cause more chaos later on.

Best,

Daisy

September 6, 2013 - 6:20am