I am usually at least 12 pounds skinnier, and I have gained weight because of turning to food for comfort during a stressful time while moving to another state and having a boyfriend who was cheating on me and not working enough to support myself so I had to live in his apartment even though we weren't together and he was still trying to have sex with me and I found out there were other girls he was with when he was with me also. This destroyed my self confidence. I haven't lost a pound and this happened 2 years ago, but for some reason I don't want to loose the weight, I don't care about my life anymore, and I haven't had a good long term relationship in a long time and I feel like I can't trust any men anymore, I am also breaking out under my chin and all over my neck and jawline and I started getting these breakouts of and on since I broke up with him but it is the worst it was ever been right now and I have sore breasts for 3 weeks out of the month since that time in my life and nothing has improved. I have an eating disorder also, and am very critical of my eating habits so that adds a lot of stress on me when I eat anything I am depressed and I am confused about what step to take next in life.
I want to feel better but I don't feel good anymore, I used to teach aerobics, personal train, and I even went to a nutrition school but I tried to teach a yoga class for the first time in 2 years and the day of I woke up with 4 whiteheads on the front of my neck, I had never gotten that before! I was so nervous teaching that I couldn't enjoy it even though people said they lied it a client even took me to breakfast after! But deep inside I still don't feel good enough because of my weight I don't want people looking at me.
I don't know if I should continue teaching yoga because I was hired to even though I feel such low confidence and I am more stressed teaching right now?
I'm sorry this is so long!