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Memory of undressed (nudist?) dad still affects me

By Anonymous June 28, 2009 - 8:27am
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When I was young I saw my father without clothes on more than one occasion. my bedroom was between theirs and the bathroom and he would sleep without clothes on but if he had to go to the bathroom he wouldn't put clothes on. So I saw him naked on a few occasions. That's all that ever happened, he was a wonderful dad, he just had a little bit of a nudist in him i think.

But now I really don't like the sight of a man's penis. I am just now realizing this is probably related. That when I saw my dad's, i realized it was something i wasn't supposed to see. plus at that age, you know, things like that just look weird. Scary even. I was probably between 10 and 15.

here's my question: how can i change this? my reaction, i mean. To this day it just feels like there is something ugly about it or something I"m not supposed to look at. I don't see it as appealing or exciting. (Sex is fine, it's just the actual physical appearance that bothers me.)

thanks in advance for any thoughts.

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EmpowHER Guest

your probably right, its somehow connected to seeing your dad, eh weird, specially when your like 15 already. its like when you have a bad experience with something everytime you see that type of object it triggers back those memories.

July 12, 2010 - 6:16am
EmpowHER Guest

Anonymous, it seems to me that feeling a penis is something you're not supposed to look at may reflect a more general attitude that sex is something you're not really supposed to do, and if you are young, you may get over this feeling as you become accustomed to being an adult. You say that sex is fine, but 'fine' is not a very enthusiastic way to describe sex. Besides their penises, are you otherwise attracted to men? You dont mention if you are married or have a boyfriend, but I suspect that once you develop a close and intimate relationship with a man that you will become used to seeing him naked, and you will begin to stop equating the sight of a naked man to the memories of seeing parts of your father you know you werent supposed to.
As for the other comments - I agree that men's bodies are not as beautiful as womens (just as there are many species where one sex is more physically attractive than the other). But it is not so that one has to be into a guy to appreciate his body; I for one love penises, and would never describe one as repulsive, hideous, or ridiculous. After all, 'form follows function', and I find a lot of beauty in something so wonderful as that!

July 16, 2009 - 6:55am

I'll second Miscortes...I find the penis to be somewhat hideous, ridiculous at best! I believe that a women HAS to be INTO the man to accept his penis as something beautiful. When you love a man, all of him becomes attractive. I caught one or two glimpses of my Father's parts when I was a child and like you, was quite horrified! Maybe it's not as abnormal as you think, to be bothered negatively by a parent's nudity....maybe our experiences should make parents cover up a bit. My boyfriend (who is black) has never been attracted to black women's bodies as his Mother used to walk around naked when he was a kid!

June 28, 2009 - 9:51am
EmpowHER Guest

I think the fact that you recognize the reason why you find a penis repulsive is a step in the right direction. To be honest, I think most woman will say that a penis is not attractive. You’re not alone. If sex is not an issue, I wouldn’t be too concerned.

Do you think besides the fact that you think it is not attractive, it bothers you?

June 28, 2009 - 9:35am
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