I've been with a man for over a year. When we met, although he was very outgoing, friendly, loving person, he was going through a difficult semi-depression that came into life when he broke up with his girlfriend of 16 years (first love, on and off relationship). It is important to mention I believe, that she wasn't treating him right, sleeping around with his mates, not showing him enough affection, being more less cold towards him, although she was a nymphomanic and he (as stated by friend psychologist) got sexually addcited to her, having sex up to 10 times a day. To cut long story short- it was a sick love, splitting up every 2 weeks, sleeping around (both of them), getting back together (addcition) etc etc. In the end, he got enough, left his normal life and came to England (where we met) and in the meantime the girl got married. We met 6 months after they broke up and he fallen in love with me. Because during these 6 months he did not have anybody, he was hungry for sex but also for a caring relationship. We had amazing sex life, he was always up for it and he was the one coming to me get it. Gradually, we started having problems in our relationship, and although i knew he really loved me and he would never cheat on me, i knew that his ex is the only one he could potentially talk behind my back to, and not because he missed her so badly but because she was a part of his life for so long and she more less possessed him (apparently her mother is into black magic etc). One day, i found him talking to her on skype, he would not tell me that its her, was swearing its his cousin, he didnt want to lose me. But i got mad, told him things i then regreted in a way, emotions too over and i said things like 'you;re a mummy boy, dont know how to do anything, even how to f*** me, which wasnt even the case but i was mad. As the time went by, our sex life became first boring, then it didnt happen at all. I apologised him 1000 times for my words, he apologised me for talking to her, things got better between us, i met his family, he met mine, and we are currently getting engaged. BUT, as much as i love him, i have my needs. For the last 6-7 months, he never came to me wanting to do make love, i used to dress up for him, buying expensive underwear, perfumes, making myself beautiful (and i'm an attractive young woman, slim, long dark hair, olive complexion- there's nothing potentially wrong with me) and he just wouldnt react, he would ignore me, just cuddle up and sleep. I used to cry every night and scream and shout 'why dont you want to make love to me, whats wrong with me, dont you like me anymore etc etc' he would always tell me theres nothing wrong with me, and that he's got a problem, he's got some 'blocade'. I used to push him to do it and it was literally to shut me up, 10mins from the back once every 3 weeks. I spoke to him so many times and i see how bad he feels with himself, seeing me crying and shouting and putting pressure on him all the time, he keeps promissing me that verything will change and i have to understand him but i'm just so fed up with it, i started being attracted to other man because sex is always on the back of my mind since i cant get it with my own boyfriend. What makes things worst is that he was a bit of a history and used to sleep with so many girls in the past (thats when him and his ex used to split up for a bit), everybody told me he used to have like 3-4 girls a day, and he's an attractive guy, there are always girls looking at him. And now, i'm here, in bed with him, all sexy and nice and he wouldnt want to touch me anymore. It makes me feel so unattractive and fat, i'm always looking in the mirror finding whats wrong with me.. Just the last aspect to add is that he tends to put himself down a lot, either that he's too short or his hair is falling out (he's planning to splash out massive ammout of money for the oparation to get his hair back), that when he was younger all the girls were attracted to him as he was better looking etc. Can this have anything to do with it? Since i met his parents, they fallen in love with me and encouraged him to marry me and he talkas about it all the time, me being his wife, getting babies etc. So i believe he loves me, but maybe he feels some kind of pressure like his parents wanting him to do it so he cant say no to them (he respects them so so much)? Maybe he still loves his ex and his missing her? Or maybe there's something wrong with me? Please if anyone has any ideas, let me know..
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