My husband claims to have ED,cant maintain an erection during sex, unless he takes a sex stimulate, so he doesnt annitiate sex with me unless its just for a blowjob to satisfy him. leaves me hanging and frustrated, I would have sex anytime,but hes too

Hello Anonymous,

Welcome to EmpowHER. Thank you for reaching out to our community with your situation. I am assuming that your husband has not been diagnosed by his physician with erectile dysfunction, but claims to suffer with it.

I hear how the lack of sexual intimacy is negatively impacting you. Your feelings are justified.

Consider scheduling an appointment with a urologist. After the initial exam and consultation to determine if indeed your husband has ED, together speak with the doctor. I think an open and honest conversation with a specialist can be of benefit to both of you.

“Having sex is good, masturbating is good, but the concept that men have to go out and have sex to preserve erectile function is bogus,” says Irwin Goldstein, MD, director of sexual medicine at Alvarado Hospital in San Diego.

Ira D. Sharlip, MD, clinical professor of urology at the University of California at San Francisco School of Medicine and a spokesman for the American Urological Association, says that infrequent sex is more likely to be a consequence of ED than a cause.

Regards,
Maryann