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Q: 

unable to conceive.

By October 7, 2014 - 9:50am
 
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Hi,

I'm 29 year old. My husb and I are planning for a baby for the past 3 years with no success. Haven't conceived at all. My periods are regular. Both of us had all possible tests and we do not have any issues with fertility. Our doctor could also not find any clue on what could be the issue... I had undergone 2 IUI's last year with negative result. We are not sure why I'm unable to become pregnant. We do have regular sex in and around ovulation and I lie back for around 1 hr after ejaculation. My parents are forcing me to go in for IVF. But I'm not ready for it. Please suggest me what is the best for us. Is it good to go for IVF? I'm worried about the pain involved and most of the IVF ends up in having twins (which I'm not interested)! Are there any other ways to conceive??!! I'm confused! Pls help.

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Guide

Hi Empower,

Glad you got my message! We tried the sticks for a while and they were inaccurate. Once we invested the money in the device, it was really amazing. It will actually tell you when to have sex to try and get pregnant. 

I would relax, stop thinking about the IVF stuff and when people offer their "unsolicited advice", kindly say, thank you but this is really a private issue with my hubby. There's nothing worse than having external pressure. Say it kindly and lovingly, but let them know that you "got this!"

I would buy the monitor....take a deep breath...read the instructions thoroughly and go back to enjoying life with your man! When the little machine beeps, surprise him with a candle lit bubble bath and...well you know...be creative ;-)

He will probably enjoy having all the pressure lifted too. Try this for 3-6 months. If you are not pregnant in 6 months, we can chat about options. 

I think you are going to have good luck!

Best,

Kristin

October 8, 2014 - 12:18pm

Thanks for the awesome response Kristin. We just tried using those sticks. Let me try using the Clear blue monitor from next time.

As you said, we are planning every month under pressure. That could be the main reason why it's becoming difficult for me to become pregnant!! I too know that I'm young. So let me wait before taking the big step :)
Thanks a lot :)

October 8, 2014 - 4:02am
Guide

Hi empower,

Thank you for sharing your situation and question with the EmpowHER community! You certainly are not alone in your efforts to conceive! 

I am sorry to hear that you and your husband are having such difficulties! Please, please don't feel pressured to go in for IVF! It is such a personal decision and one that no one should pressure you into! You are still young and healthy so no need to rush into that (in my opinion). 

I have a family member who tried to get pregnant for 7 years! Through IVF, surrogates...the whole works! Only when she was finally approved for an adoption did she stop her IVF hormones and relax. In the process of adopting her son, she unexpectedly got pregnant (at age 42!!!) naturally! There's always hope! I hear women get pregnant when they relax and stop trying.

But for those of us who try really hard (Speaking for myself) it's hard to just relax and sit back and let nature's miracle happen. I wanted a baby so bad and I am a planner, so when my hubby and I decided it was "time" I ran out and bought the Clear Blue Easy Fertility Monitor. Sure enough, it told me the exact moment I was ovulating...and that did the trick...TWICE to be exact. 

Have you tried using a fertility monitor (not just the sticks??) The sticks did not work for me. 

The good news is that you are still young and can keep trying. I know it's probably very disappointing every month that your period comes, but don't feel pressured to start IVF if you and your hubby aren't 100% in! 

Have you tried the monitor? If not, give it a go and follow it EXACTLY!

Please let me know what you think. I'd love to keep in touch!

Best,

Kristin

October 7, 2014 - 2:08pm
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