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In a relationship, Jealousy is a reaction to a perceived threat--real or imagined--to a valued relationship or to its quality. We’ve all had this feeling at one point or another in our lives. But for some people jealousy is an emotion that takes over their lives—it’s not just a feeling that arises every now and again, but more often than they wished. Being jealous will certainly ruin a relationship but even more, to a person whose life revolves around another and is constantly worried about what they’re doing, where they’re going, and who they’re with—jealousy is a certain recipe for self-disaster.
Some of our readers have written to EmpowHer for advice on how to control their jealousy.
https://www.empowher.com/community/ask/how-can-i-be-confident-my-relationship-when-other-women-flirt-my-man-my-presence
https://www.empowher.com/community/ask/what-can-i-do-control-my-feelings-jealousy
It is important to differentiate "normal" jealousy from "delusional" jealousy. Normal jealousy has its basis on a real threat to the relationship; delusional jealousy persists despite the absence of any real or even probable threat.
The good news is this: By recognizing the signs of romantic jealousy, by realizing what feelings are normal and abnormal, and by examining the roots of our jealous feelings, we can effectively learn to cope with it by changing our behavior. Believe it or not, like other difficult emotional experiences, jealousy can be a trigger for growth, increased self-awareness, and greater understanding of both your partner and your relationship.
Here’s a great article on Jealousy found on Psychology Today—for anyone who is “normal” jealous, “delusional” jealous, or not sure where they stand:
April 22, 2011 - 11:37amhttp://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200910/romantic-jealousy
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