People tell me that I’ve done so well because I have such a great attitude. A couple of friends that knew over Christmas-time that I was waiting to hear final results said to me, “I can’t believe how well you are handling this.” I finally asked someone what they truly meant by that. He said, “You’re not moping around. You’re still laughing and doing other things.”
I asked someone else. She said, “I would be lying in bed crying.”
That option never even occurred to me. I’ve done that when a relationship has broken up, but I’ve never given cancer that much power. (And I try to avoid giving a bad boyfriend that much power, too!)
I never thought about the fact “that I need to have a good attitude.” Or that I should put the principles of The Secret into play. The “Laws of Attraction” are ever present in our society now, especially in a community like Sedona, AZ—perhaps the New Age capital of the world.
I am usually very positive and upbeat. I love my life. Yet the questions are out there--Did something about my attitude or something about the way I live my life bring my cancer back? Or make me get it in the first place? Do I have bad feng shui in my bedroom? Is there lingering anger about my divorce (20 years ago) as some have suggested (but I do not believe)?
I actually choose not to pay too much attention to those things. For reasons much broader than having cancer, I try to live the best life I can. Be a good neighbor. A concerned citizen of the world. Help others. Keep commitments. Be honest and ethical. Be true to myself and my friends. Live with intention. Live in the present. Go after my passions. Celebrate my daughter.
But all these messages and input coming at you can be tough—and overwhelming. My advice for those who have a friend with a tough medical condition? Try to not offer advice unless asked—or if they are truly not advocating for themselves. Just be there for them. Listen. Ask—“how are you doing today and anything I can do for you?”
All user-generated information on this site is the opinion of its author only and is not a substitute for medical advice or treatment for any medical conditions. Members and guests are responsible for their own posts and the potential consequences of those posts detailed in our Terms of Service.