I got with this "amazing" guy late last year , till April this year , everything g was going great , till he cheated and I determined to "make" it work , stayed in the relationship . Now , at this point , I started going out a bit more , getting more and more drunk , more and more angry at life . At first , without noticing , but , then , I started talking to a bunch of other guys , to try and forget and nd get over the initial bf . The attention seemed to help , made me feel like I still got it , but , I got tired of it . Now , I didn't sleep with any of these men, but , I can't lie .. I almost wanted to .so then , this particular guy , let's call him Mr. D caught my attention, started talking , hang out .. almost became serious , until , he started ignoring me . Almost , ghosting me to some point . So , I collected myself and walked away , rather I thought I collected myself and walked away . I spent days , still spend days thinking about the what ifs , what if I didn't meet these people , what if I lisented to that one friend who cut ties with me the moment I started dating my now ex bf ? What if I stood up , after all this feeling of being needy for a man to be by my side , and actually moved on ? What if I didn't drink as much and make poor decisions? What if I could juSt disappear and come back when everything has cooled down ? What if all this being friendly towards people is as way of me saying to my self that I'm dependant on human approval ? I really don't know what to think at this point. Help ?