My partner of 17 years hasn't been intimate with me at all for 3 years he says it's due to him having severe crohns..I've done the research and yes it could be true..however kids before work cuddles and in everything else he is unreal..I've let it go but lately started to think something more..3years ago I found a secret Twitter account that he'd had for 3 years where he spoke to a workmate eeveryday flirty txts etc and he worked nights with every night for 3years ..he won't add me on Facebook Twitter claiming ebook just for work mates when I challenged him he'd visited her home with work mates when she broke a leg ..but I was in hospital with pneumonia the same week but he couldn't visit me he went on a works leaving party and came in at 6am I later found out it was her do..five mins before going to the nite out he was in the bathroom liking her pic on Facebook..so many inconsistencies but after talking to him when I was about to ask for the door and car keys he promised nothing happened she was one of the lads..this was Aug 2015 he never leaves his phone unattended for a second even if he gets up at 3am for bathroom phone goes too..I ljust recently found out he went to visit her twice at home not once..it's making me ill i know he's not doing anything and has no time to see anyone..she's now moved to another job..just the other week I told him take her off Twitter Facebook and her number out of your phone..which he did..if that was me I would have done it in August 2015 when I'd been caught..she's got a partner now and doesn't use Twitter but because of the lack of trust I'm thinking have they made New accounts..I found her phone number but would never ring txt her as I'm an adult but have been close as she has ruined the last 2 years of my life..now the sex he has severe crohns and we haven't had sex in 3 years but it coincides with his Twitter so I don't know if he's using that as an excuse..I asked him if he wanted to leave and was bemused that I'd ask that question but my gut keeps saying something's not right and when I try to bring up sex which has only been in the last 6 months his response is you are always Iill I'm Iill our daughter's in etc..I keep deferring from the sex issue but we go abroad in June and I have told him different surroundings his new treatment will be working we need to get intimate and has agreed but I know it won't happen..the main point is I wouldn't even be bothered about sex anyway it's just the not knowing if he can't or just doesn't want to cause it's me..sorry long winded but I haven't told anyone else and needed to get it off my chest so do I believe him or is he just a bare face liar
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Hello sadandtired50,
Welcome to the EmpowHER community. Thank you for sharing your situation with us. I hope it helped to vent your feelings and concerns. That can be very beneficial. Re reading what you worote may give you some perspective.
Beyond the issue of lack of sex, I see the looming issue of trust or lack of trust. The other woman, having his phone with him at all times, and his guarded communication and interactions with this woman raise my suspicions.
Regards,
February 28, 2017 - 9:08amMaryann
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Thanks for your answer I know u feel better after getting off my chest ..He also says he's just to think that I thought he would just me this way. But so many inconsistencies and having to check fbook each week to see if he's added her again..My heart says he's as honest as the days long but it's the but feeling that keeps resurfacing every few months did he didn't he ? So I'm txting from bed while he's dozing on the couch then it's a polite kiss goodnite and he falls asleep..my mind is saying but he falls asleep holding my hand he couldn't pick me out in a line out if I was in underwear..do I call it quits or believe it's down to his crohns and fatigue and hope things change when his treatment starts working..do I lose the best thing that's ever happened to me just because of a gut feeling never knowing if he was totally innocent all along..then she wins
February 28, 2017 - 4:00pmThis Comment