Today was another full day of running around. For someone who is not currently working, I seem to have a lot going on. Somehow my days fill and seem to fly by.
I went to pilates class this morning. I feel like I am getting stronger by the day. I felt a big difference from the first time I went a few weeks ago. It was almost like learning how to use the reformer machines all over again since it’s been so long since I have taken classes. The pain doctor doesn’t want me doing pilates or yoga, but I feel like it helps to keep me sane and it helps me to build strength. I had the instructor speak to my physical and occupational therapist so she is aware of the types of exercise that I can and cannot do.
The past few days I have consumed with getting ready for the trip to New Zealand and Australia. The trip is a little complicated because we will be hopping around so much from place to place. I just hope we're not trying to squeeze too much into a short amount of time.
We finally got all of our flights booked except for the leg where we fly from the south island back to Auckland and then home. So far we will be flying into Auckland for a couple of days, then Sydney for four days, back to Christchurch New Zealand, rent a car and drive down to Queenstown, and then fly back to Auckland to fly home. It’s making me tired just thinking about it! Now we just need to coordinate the hotels and figure out exactly where we want to spend our time. Hmmm, maybe I can get a travel agent to help out.
Tomorrow I have to go to CTCA for infusion and to meet with the doctors. It seems that I am meeting with them now once every couple of weeks to check in. I still have to go to infusion for Erbitux every week. I haven’t done chemo now for some time and feel like I am getting stronger by the day. I still feel some of the side effects, mostly just fatigue and a little nausea every once in awhile. I think I will probably have these side effects for a few more months.When I get back from the trip we will do another petscan to see the progress. I am just hoping that everything is still good and I don’t have to go back on chemo. That stuff is horrible! I would be so happy if I never had to take it again.
I have been a little worried the past week or two. Ever since I heard about Tom I have this feeling like something is going to happen to me. I know it sounds strange, but it scares me sometimes. Death doesn’t seem like it is anywhere near, but it does make me stop to think and his death made everything so much more real and tangible. I have been emailing a little with his wife. She lives here in Arizona. I haven’t met her yet, but we are going to try to meet up sometime soon. I feel absolutely horrible for her to lose her new husband. I give her so much credit for sticking by his side and getting married just a few months ago.
-The Melissa Waller Blog
www.themelissawaller.com
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Hi Melissa - I'm impressed by all the things you're doing these days. Many perfectly healthy people aren't accomplishing nearly as much as you! I'm so glad you have your dream trip ahead and so much to look forward to.
It's a different world we go into as cancer patients, with people all around us who are fighting for their lives. When one of them doesn't make it that becomes a gut level reminder of our own mortality and that the clock is ticking. Of course you're affected by Tom's death, and what his wife is going through right now. But in many ways a fellow patient's death is also a reminder that we need to make the most of every single moment that we have right now. In some ways that's a blessing. A lot of people just plow through life day after day without giving a thought to how precious and short their time is and how much the people in their lives mean to them. You're not one of those people, Melissa, and the gift you give to others by sharing your life with us - whether though this blog or in face to face meetings - means a lot. Take care of yourself, we're looking forward to your next post. Pat
February 26, 2010 - 6:06pmThis Comment