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Hello Baby, Goodbye Bikini

 
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My third baby had just tuned 10 months old and summer was here. Our family was getting ready for summer vacation, the beach, and swimming. As I packed for our trip, I found something in my closet that I hadn’t worn for a while.

There it was, placed carefully with the pretty lingerie sets (which also hadn’t seen the outside of the closet for some time), my beloved black bikini. As I held it up to look at it, it brought me back to all the fun times that I had worn it. It was still jet black. The quality material hadn’t stretched or faded despite the number of times worn. It went with everything. It fit under my favorite shorts and tanks. It went with my long skirts and wide brimmed beach hats. The style was simple and it had fit me perfectly.

The day that I bought that suit was typical of my single lifestyle, at the time. My boyfriend (now husband) and I had decided with friends to go on a last minute tropical weekend trip. As my friend and I ran out to the mall to grab weekend necessities, I spotted my new swimsuit, tried it on and bought it on the spot. That was just the beginning for that suit to accompany me on many vacation adventures.

“AH,” I sighed aloud as I looked at my suit I hadn’t worn since before getting pregnant. It was now 2 sizes too small and even if it wasn’t, if I ever dared to wear it, I would surely be photographed and my picture submitted to one of those magazines that publishes those “Fashion Don’t” pictures.

The extra “cushion” around my stomach (I call it the Mommy Middle) was not what I would consider a desirable accessory. My body was still not where I wanted it to be after having my baby.

Yes, times had changed. My swimsuit hadn’t gone out of style, but I had. That style was no longer mine and I had to admit that I missed it. Gone were the days of barely there bikinis, last minute weekend getaways, and spending money on things for myself on a whim. My current fashion accessories were a six year old, a four year old, a ten month old and my trusty diaper bag. What kind of swimsuit goes with that?

For a moment, I wished not for the sunny beach vacation we had planned, but for something where the weather was cooler and I could wear sweaters and NOT a swimsuit.

Then I remembered the first time our boys saw the ocean. We chased waves and searched for seashells on beach. We splashed in the cool water and tasted the salt on our lips. We had a picnic under the sun and built sand castles until the waves crashed them down. We laughed until our sides hurt while we buried each other’s feet in the sand and pretended to be crabs. And not once did I miss my black bikini.

I treasure my memories of BK times (Before Kids), but couldn’t imagine my life without experiencing new adventures with my husband and kids.

I fold up my black bikini and place it back in my closet, not yet ready to get rid of it. Then I go to my computer, log onto the Land's End website, and search the pages in hopes of finding the perfect SLENDERIZING swimsuit. Vacation, here I come!

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We value and respect our HERWriters' experiences, but everyone is different. Many of our writers are speaking from personal experience, and what's worked for them may not work for you. Their articles are not a substitute for medical advice, although we hope you can gain knowledge from their insight.

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