I'm Your Baby Tonight

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We call each other "baby." I know we call each other other things too. Don't get me started. Some of our nicknames for each other are hilarious and some are awful, but"baby" has got to be up there in the top 10 list of endearments. But what does it mean? In our relationships, if we are not taking care of ourselves, we can become ornery, mean, overly sensitive and selfish. What if we're not taking care of our partner? And how much is too much in terms of care taking, taking care of someone's feelings, being considerate or doing things for them?

In striving to strike a balance between giving too much and not enough, we need to spend some time understanding our own inner "baby" or the part of us that really is a baby, or wants to be babied or nurtured, cherished, loved, and taken care of. Then we need to understand that there are certain types of these needs that our partner is not going to be able to meet, nor should they be expected to, and that there are a certain number of these needs that we need to be up front about, and to express, so that our partner has a fair shake at meeting them because they actually know what they are.

When you're not feeling up to going out but your significant other is, for example, is this a "baby" part of you that wants to know you are more important to your partner than the fun times at the party with friends? Or are you not feeling the need to have "baby" needs met, you want them to go have fun, but a kiss and a cuddle before they walk out the door sure would make you feel wonderful.
The point is, if we don't know what we need at the deepest levels, how will we be able to communicate these needs to our loved one either verbally, non-verbally or through telepathy?

Babying someone and being babied (and I'm not talking about a full-on diaper fetish, although that has its place in this discussion) can be some of the most loving, most wonderful, most extraordinary part of being in a relationship with someone. You get to care for someone, cooking for them, loving their quirks, bringing them tea when they're not feeling well. But you also get to be cared for, you feel safe, warm, loved, cozy, embraced. This type of babying has been debased too much in our current cultural climate of oversexualization and materialism. "Baby" practically means "streetwalker" and to have a "sugar daddy" or "sugar mama" is to have a parental figure with a lot of money taking care, not of your inner emotional needs, but your credit card bills.

The danger of falling out of touch with the deeper aspects of being babied and babying someone is that you can lose the adult part of yourself as well. By acknowledging this need for babying you can get these needs met more easily and help yourself to actually mature, become an accepting, tolerant adult, capable and responsible, hard working and dedicated to things beyond your own comfort.
Love to love you baby, I'm your baby tonight, I Got You, Babe, baby I'm yours... with all the feelings and thoughts the word "baby" conjures, we could do worse than to spend some time getting to know this silly baby.

Aimee Boyle fights off her vicious grey tiger cat with aluminum foil cat toys and feather shakers and writes regularly for EmpowHER.

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