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It may surprise you to find out that more and more people are comfortable giving the gift of plastic surgery. But don’t wrap your brain around that concept and stop there. One plastic surgeon in Beverly Hills has developed a gift card as an option for his clients, even claiming that children present their moms with gifts of plastic surgery. The practice suggests kids can give their moms a mommy makeover for Mother’s Day!
That concept seems strange in SO many ways.
But even more unsettling is the idea of parents gifting cosmetic surgery to their kids. A couple of years ago, MSNBC reported that although teens still make up a small percentage of plastic surgery patients, the numbers are growing. In fact, around a quarter of a million people 19 years old or younger undergo cosmetic procedures annually.
It’s a good guess that not too many EmpowHER readers consider giving plastic surgery to others. But let’s say you are thinking about it. Why, exactly, is plastic surgery not one of your better gift ideas?
The most obvious reason is that the decision to have plastic surgery is one that needs to be thought through very carefully, from the most objective standpoint possible. A prospective patient should be weighing the risks of surgery against the anticipated benefits. She should be thinking about the possible ramifications down the road. She needs to consider how she and her family and friends may react to her new appearance, in perhaps unexpected ways. How to handle the cost of surgery is a completely different matter, one that should be kept separate from the initial decision. An offer to help pay may sway a prospective patient.
Another consideration is the message a plastic surgery gift may send. Unless you know the recipient very well and you’ve taken an active role in her decision making process, your gift may say, “I agree you have something wrong with your looks, in fact, I will help pay for a fix.” Probably not a sentiment you want to convey.
When parents give children plastic surgery as a gift, there are even more possible pitfalls. First is the simple truth that many areas of the body don’t fully mature until people are in their 20’s—notably the breasts. Teens who are unhappy with their cup size may still see some change down the road as their bodies settle into adulthood.
The flip side of the physical coin is psychological immaturity. A doctor quoted in the MSNBC story noted that young people, who tend to live their lives almost exclusively in the here and now, aren’t usually very well equipped to think about the future. For most, an “I want to look better now,” motive will trump the “how will I look later on,” question every time.
It’s even more important to consider the messages a plastic surgery gift may send a young person than it is with a prospective patient who’s older. An adolescent counselor, also interviewed for the MSNBC article, said she worries about the “quick fix” aspect of surgery for teens. She fears that gifts of plastic surgery may make it harder for young people to develop coping skills. “If you can’t meet the expectations of society, just get surgery,” she remarked.
No parent wants to send the message to their teen that they’re not perfectly acceptable just the way they are. But not only might a plastic surgery gift do that, it could also set a young recipient up for more and more procedures down the road. For some young women, plastic surgery compounds the effects of BDD, or body dysmorphic disorder, in which the patient believes (falsely) they’re ugly. For others, if the first surgery is easy—an easy decision, easy recovery and easy on the pocketbook—it may be a short journey to the second and third procedure.
In the tradition of “never say never,” of course there may be cases in which helping someone else pay for plastic surgery is the right choice. Perhaps your young son, with ears that stick out from his head, suffers from constant teasing. And say that you, your son and your son's pediatrician agree that having his ears pinned back is a good move. In this case, you may opt for surgery, viewing it as a solution rather than a gift.
Or maybe you have a dear friend, an adult, who has hated her nose all her life and has always wanted surgery but can’t afford it on her own. If the motivation is pure, the decision is made and you just want to contribute, a gift or a loan might make both of you feel great.
But if the case is not just that crystal clear, you’re better off with a warm pair of slippers or a cozy sweater this holiday season.
Add a Comment2 Comments
At least I know what to get as a shower gift!
December 19, 2009 - 11:55amThis Comment
That could potentially be a gift that turns into a disastrous one. BUT I would venture to say that if someone gave the gift of plastic surgery to a wife, daughter, husband, aunt, etc. it would be because the person has strongly expressed their desire to have surgery. Plastic surgery is a sensitive zone where NO ONE wants to go if the idea has never entered the recipients mind. I, on the other hand, will gladly accept a plastic surgery gift card to use after the birth of my second child. Great gift idea if you ask me. ;-)
December 16, 2009 - 6:51amThis Comment