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I was an investment banker for nearly 20 years. It's a tough, male-dominated, high-stakes and high-stress field with its own aura of glamour, potential for crazy money, and success comes at a price.

My husband and I were lucky enough to have my mom available to help with the kids. But, he and I would plan our travel so that we'd be able to spend a whole weekend together. My career took my health, and nearly took my family from me.

Working moms are told they have to balance family and career. Mary Kay Ash told her minions that we women really could have it all, IF we kept the balance: God first, family second, work last. Just tell that to corporate America.

Corporate America doesn't want us to have it all. How many company-sponsored daycare facilities do you know of? How many moms can afford to take a few days off work to be home with sick kids or on umpteen school days out? It's harder for working moms because we're expected to take care of hubby, house and home AND be effective on the job. We have a lot more on the plate to deal with, let's face it.

The park bench looked pretty darned good to me for the handful of years I swapped it for my perfect office view. I was at the ball games, the school performances and the important events. As one who was raised by a nanny, I can say firsthand that I viewed being there for my kids from a different perspective than other baseball/orchestra/scout/whatever moms - I didn't take it for granted.

Personally, I think "balance" is a myth. The only reality is making choices.

September 5, 2008 - 6:58pm

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