This is the one with the BPD husband again... when I first melted down like 6 years ago thinking I was the psycho in our relationship he took me to a psychologist. I had fallen into a total breakdown and was crying because I was so unhappy at home and felt so low... so I went in a talked to the therapist by myself on the 1st visit. He talked to my husband alone on the 2nd visit. And I went in alone again on the 3rd visit and he told me something along the lines of I was definitely the problem and had to be worked on. I never went back.
Two years later I had to go to therapy again. I melted down after I came back home after 6 months away, and living under a roof with my husband again had made me so incapacitated I had to solicit a friend to call my insurance and find me a therapist.
I hid this from my husband and went for a year or more. I hit it off with the therapist personality wise... and it was more like coming to talk to a friend. I would just tell her whatever I was doing and about various interactions I was having at home or work or wherever. By having a therapist that I really enjoyed visiting with like a girlfriend, I was able to explore my thoughts and take what I would learn and use it to work in the marriage. And from hearing my "what I did this week" blabber, ultimately she detected the pattern of the Borderline Personality acts coming from my husband. And it fit exactly into how I was behaving and feeling. She solved the ultimate riddle in my life.
She probably would have never recognized the BPD if he had been with me on all of the visits, because I would have been less open in general, and because his presence would have just confused things. I would have been told to communicate and listen better. Turns out I was the only one in our marriage capable of doing either. :)
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This is the one with the BPD husband again... when I first melted down like 6 years ago thinking I was the psycho in our relationship he took me to a psychologist. I had fallen into a total breakdown and was crying because I was so unhappy at home and felt so low... so I went in a talked to the therapist by myself on the 1st visit. He talked to my husband alone on the 2nd visit. And I went in alone again on the 3rd visit and he told me something along the lines of I was definitely the problem and had to be worked on. I never went back.
Two years later I had to go to therapy again. I melted down after I came back home after 6 months away, and living under a roof with my husband again had made me so incapacitated I had to solicit a friend to call my insurance and find me a therapist.
I hid this from my husband and went for a year or more. I hit it off with the therapist personality wise... and it was more like coming to talk to a friend. I would just tell her whatever I was doing and about various interactions I was having at home or work or wherever. By having a therapist that I really enjoyed visiting with like a girlfriend, I was able to explore my thoughts and take what I would learn and use it to work in the marriage. And from hearing my "what I did this week" blabber, ultimately she detected the pattern of the Borderline Personality acts coming from my husband. And it fit exactly into how I was behaving and feeling. She solved the ultimate riddle in my life.
She probably would have never recognized the BPD if he had been with me on all of the visits, because I would have been less open in general, and because his presence would have just confused things. I would have been told to communicate and listen better. Turns out I was the only one in our marriage capable of doing either. :)
October 25, 2009 - 1:01amThis Comment
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