Pat ElliottExpertHERWriterGuideBlogger(reply to Anonymous)
Anon - Thanks for sharing your story, and we're glad you found comfort in the many comments made on this thread. You are by no means a heartless deviant in any way. I am a cancer patient myself, and I have friends who also travel to MD Anderson for treatment. The process of dealing with cancer, whether you're the patient or the caregiver, is a hardship in many ways. The strong focus on the clinical aspects of cancer to help the patient are admirable, but there are major gaps in addressing the psych-social needs of both patients and caregivers. It's sad that at a time when life has changed forever and people are needing a brand new road map there are few directions given. I think the general public gets their impression of what one is "supposed to do" in these situations from Hollywood, and that of course has little resemblance to the real world. I am glad you are doing what you need to do for YOU in your personal situation, as your physical and mental health is also at stake when your spouse is a cancer patient. I hope you will take the time to review some of our articles about dealing with stress and with self-care as you have most likely had to make a lot of sacrifices in the past year and a half, and I want you to know that is not only okay to look out for your own needs, it is also necessary. Whatever decisions you make about your life and the new path that you're on are your own, are similar to what many other women have also gone through, and are perfectly normal. I wish you the very best as you continue on this journey.
Take care,
Pat
Comment Reply
Anon - Thanks for sharing your story, and we're glad you found comfort in the many comments made on this thread. You are by no means a heartless deviant in any way. I am a cancer patient myself, and I have friends who also travel to MD Anderson for treatment. The process of dealing with cancer, whether you're the patient or the caregiver, is a hardship in many ways. The strong focus on the clinical aspects of cancer to help the patient are admirable, but there are major gaps in addressing the psych-social needs of both patients and caregivers. It's sad that at a time when life has changed forever and people are needing a brand new road map there are few directions given. I think the general public gets their impression of what one is "supposed to do" in these situations from Hollywood, and that of course has little resemblance to the real world. I am glad you are doing what you need to do for YOU in your personal situation, as your physical and mental health is also at stake when your spouse is a cancer patient. I hope you will take the time to review some of our articles about dealing with stress and with self-care as you have most likely had to make a lot of sacrifices in the past year and a half, and I want you to know that is not only okay to look out for your own needs, it is also necessary. Whatever decisions you make about your life and the new path that you're on are your own, are similar to what many other women have also gone through, and are perfectly normal. I wish you the very best as you continue on this journey.
October 22, 2010 - 4:37pmTake care,
Pat
This Comment
Reply