There are many techniques that you can use to help resolve the unresolvable. Sure, we've all heard that too much of the "stress hormone" can wreak havoc in our body, but that is not supposed to stress you out more! This type of cortisol-overload relates more to chronic stress that occurs over long period of time, is unrelenting, and is not managed (vs. stress over an unresolved feeling or problem you are trying to sort out in the moment).
There are a few problem-solving techniques, and they fit into one of two categories (I wrote about them at this post as well, venting about a problem):
1. Problem-focused coping
2. Emotion-focused coping
Emotion-focused coping includes: venting, crying, distracting ourselves (sleeping, exercising, eating, working on another project). Venting, and these other coping mechanisms, definitely have their place, and can help you blow off steam, gain perspective, and feel calmer to move onto the next step: problem-focused coping.
Problem-focused coping moves away from "just venting", and actually puts your words into action. Did any ideas come from talking about your problem? New insights? A new way to look at the problem (reframe) or new perspective? Are you able to change the problem, or do you need to let it go?
You can try talking with a friend, journaling, writing a pros/cons list, deciding if this is a problem that is important in the big scheme of things AND is a problem that is within your control to change, and write down your various options and possible outcomes.
Let us know if you need us as a sounding board, but bottling up emotions will not help you solve your feelings or come to a solution. Talking with a therapist can also help!
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There are many techniques that you can use to help resolve the unresolvable. Sure, we've all heard that too much of the "stress hormone" can wreak havoc in our body, but that is not supposed to stress you out more! This type of cortisol-overload relates more to chronic stress that occurs over long period of time, is unrelenting, and is not managed (vs. stress over an unresolved feeling or problem you are trying to sort out in the moment).
There are a few problem-solving techniques, and they fit into one of two categories (I wrote about them at this post as well, venting about a problem):
1. Problem-focused coping
2. Emotion-focused coping
Emotion-focused coping includes: venting, crying, distracting ourselves (sleeping, exercising, eating, working on another project). Venting, and these other coping mechanisms, definitely have their place, and can help you blow off steam, gain perspective, and feel calmer to move onto the next step: problem-focused coping.
Problem-focused coping moves away from "just venting", and actually puts your words into action. Did any ideas come from talking about your problem? New insights? A new way to look at the problem (reframe) or new perspective? Are you able to change the problem, or do you need to let it go?
You can try talking with a friend, journaling, writing a pros/cons list, deciding if this is a problem that is important in the big scheme of things AND is a problem that is within your control to change, and write down your various options and possible outcomes.
Let us know if you need us as a sounding board, but bottling up emotions will not help you solve your feelings or come to a solution. Talking with a therapist can also help!
March 18, 2010 - 2:52pmThis Comment
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