What a thought-provoking post Diane. While I personally think that each of us has the ability for forgiveness and the ability for revenge, many of us realize the wisdom in taking control of our reactions. My thought has always been that revenge (action taken against another for a perceived wrong) is even more detrimental to the 'victim' -- than the original act itself and perpetuates an already strained situation. It feels like a waste of energy. I would even make the argument that revenge starts a different cycle. While I haven't experienced some of the more extreme examples you listed here (and let's face it, we've all been 'victims' of something) I turned to my husband (who is from Saigon) and has been affected first-hand by some of man's more extreme and insidious behavior and asked him his opinion about forgiveness. Here's what he had to say:
"We all need to do whatever we feel helps preserve our essence and that is forgiveness. You know what they say -- everyone has a limit. We all tend to seek love, compassion, peace, harmony, but if you begin to fill your time with other processes, such as revenge, it becomes a defining process and diminishes our nature as humans. Revenge is not an act driven by innate or intrinsic impulse but rather from outside factors. And how others act toward us rarely has to do with who we are, rather is reflection of a demon that is within a so-called perpetrator. Forgiveness, on the other, is a way of taking control from outside factors and perpetuates what I think is a human's true essence."
Thanks for generating a great conversation between my husband and I. I know not everybody sees it this way and am anxious to hear what others have to say.
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What a thought-provoking post Diane. While I personally think that each of us has the ability for forgiveness and the ability for revenge, many of us realize the wisdom in taking control of our reactions. My thought has always been that revenge (action taken against another for a perceived wrong) is even more detrimental to the 'victim' -- than the original act itself and perpetuates an already strained situation. It feels like a waste of energy. I would even make the argument that revenge starts a different cycle. While I haven't experienced some of the more extreme examples you listed here (and let's face it, we've all been 'victims' of something) I turned to my husband (who is from Saigon) and has been affected first-hand by some of man's more extreme and insidious behavior and asked him his opinion about forgiveness. Here's what he had to say:
"We all need to do whatever we feel helps preserve our essence and that is forgiveness. You know what they say -- everyone has a limit. We all tend to seek love, compassion, peace, harmony, but if you begin to fill your time with other processes, such as revenge, it becomes a defining process and diminishes our nature as humans. Revenge is not an act driven by innate or intrinsic impulse but rather from outside factors. And how others act toward us rarely has to do with who we are, rather is reflection of a demon that is within a so-called perpetrator. Forgiveness, on the other, is a way of taking control from outside factors and perpetuates what I think is a human's true essence."
Thanks for generating a great conversation between my husband and I. I know not everybody sees it this way and am anxious to hear what others have to say.
April 12, 2009 - 12:31pmThis Comment
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