Well he felt ambushed at counseling. But she assured him that it was not about that. And I told him that wasn't what it was about either. That obviously we can't commuicate and I can't understand what has happened in our marriage to cause this so maybe she could help me understand it and process it better. He is a great father to our kids and up until the last 2 years with all this drama he has been a great husband and friend. I am by no means making excuses for him or sharing the blame for his inappropriate behavior but I do feel like the behavior was a result of the breakdown of our marriage. Again, not that, that gave him the right to do what he did by any means. If he was able to be the person of integrity that he was in the past, yes, I think I could trust him again. Reality is starting to set in that I will have to make a decision at some point. Bottom line is that if he feels like he needs to remain friends with these women for whatever reason then there is no other option but divorce. If he can cut all ties and stop lying and being secretive and all that mess then I think we might have a chance. The choice he will have to make is what is more important to him. His marriage and family or these relationships. Only he can make that decision. And who knows truthfully, through counseling I may realize that I don't want to work on this anymore. Who knows. I contacted an attorney to find out my options and just a little information. He also said he wants me to keep our house if we split. I don't know if I can afford to or not. But I contacted our mortgage company to to find out my options for getting him off the mortgage as well. So as much as I hate thinking about it, I am trying to look out for myself in the event that this blows up AGAIN.
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Well he felt ambushed at counseling. But she assured him that it was not about that. And I told him that wasn't what it was about either. That obviously we can't commuicate and I can't understand what has happened in our marriage to cause this so maybe she could help me understand it and process it better. He is a great father to our kids and up until the last 2 years with all this drama he has been a great husband and friend. I am by no means making excuses for him or sharing the blame for his inappropriate behavior but I do feel like the behavior was a result of the breakdown of our marriage. Again, not that, that gave him the right to do what he did by any means. If he was able to be the person of integrity that he was in the past, yes, I think I could trust him again. Reality is starting to set in that I will have to make a decision at some point. Bottom line is that if he feels like he needs to remain friends with these women for whatever reason then there is no other option but divorce. If he can cut all ties and stop lying and being secretive and all that mess then I think we might have a chance. The choice he will have to make is what is more important to him. His marriage and family or these relationships. Only he can make that decision. And who knows truthfully, through counseling I may realize that I don't want to work on this anymore. Who knows. I contacted an attorney to find out my options and just a little information. He also said he wants me to keep our house if we split. I don't know if I can afford to or not. But I contacted our mortgage company to to find out my options for getting him off the mortgage as well. So as much as I hate thinking about it, I am trying to look out for myself in the event that this blows up AGAIN.
March 22, 2010 - 12:05pmThis Comment
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