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So is there a solution here? I am going through the same ordeal and its killing me. Are you saying the way to resolve this is by deciding what is important to yourself? Because that is where I run into the problem. I don't know how important sex is supposed to be in a relationship, it seems like when your having it, it doesn't matter how much. But when your not its all you can think about. I can't decide if having a good relationship, a best friend is enough.