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Anonymous

hello every one sorry for the anonymous here but i,m not a member, and the late post. so hoping to shed some lite on the other side here. I'am a 25 year old man my better half is 23 and we have been a couple for four years now and still not married. Not that we don't love each other just don't believe in it. Now for me ,and i hope for her, I love her to death . i love spending time with her, walking in the park, going out to movies , even doing the dishes with her. if she is around it places me in a better mood. sadly on my end i have lost all sexual interest and i have no idea why. but let me be clear here i do still have interest just not so much with her,and i know how bad that sounds but read on before you judge. i'am not cheating and have 0 plane to. i have been on the other end of that and it is the worst feeling ever to be cheated on. now in these four years i have and she has gained some weight but only about 15-20 pounds on each side. we are both over 6 feet so it dose not even show. now as far as i can tell it isn't her end that is failing in this relation ship it seems to be mine. i know i am having trouble with my self image as i get older,have a double chin now and i hate it, so i will deflect it at her. this my be why he is saying your weight is the problem if he is upset with the way he looks. we are also going through school to better our self, taking care of my grand parents and my sister is terminal with cancer so we have some stress in our lives as well. For me being a man if I'am stressed i don't wont sex at all. and i have in the passed blamed her for that lack of sex drive as well. Something that needs to bee understood is that as men it is very hard to accept when we are having sexual problems because we are tout that we are men and men should always want sex and if we don't then something is wrong with us and we aren't manly and so on and so on. so instead of accessing our feelings to find out what the problem is we puff out our chest and blame the closest thing in the room. now this is were my partner comes into play she has done a perfect job of creating a safe judge free environment for me, and i her. were we sit down and have lots of sweets and goodies to eat and we talk every thing out for hours in tell we can come up with a solution. lots of crying happens her more then me but me too from time to time "lots", but we never yell or get mad at each other. i guess what i'am trying to say is communication is the key here. as men we need to be able to talk things out with our others and if we cant then i'am afraid we will let relation ships die. on our end with me sex drive problem we are still working on it and i wish i could give you a fix but all i can give you is that if you two cant sit down and talk about it with out ether of you getting your feelings hurt then it will never be solved. i hope the best for you and every one else having this issue male or female.

July 26, 2015 - 6:08am

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